I drove so fast.... without any direction. I was blinded with rage. I was not thinking if I would die, what's that point? I just stomped the accelerator of my car to the maximum speed.
Trying to make the car fly.
My life flashed in front of my eyes, and she was everywhere, her eyes, voice, smile, smell even her warmth. And then everything shattered in front of me.
I was brought back by a loud horn. It happened in seconds, I thought that it is the end, but I managed to turn the car in time. I stopped at the side of the rode, and burst in a crazy wave of laugh.
Well it was a close call...
I laughed for a while tears were rolling down my face, from pain from agony. I promised myself back then when I kicked her out my life that I will never cry again, but I guess that if I won't cry I will explode.
I messed things bad between us. How will I ever look in her eyes. I vowed at my wedding that I will love and protect her till my last breath. I will be her rock her home, but all I managed to be her personal hell.
I don't know how much time passed before I puled back on the road. I drove to the park where everything began.
It was midnight now, my phone turned off and I didn't care. I wanted some time alone, I needed it. It was a calming silence, the one that enveloped you and bring an icing feeling to your soul. How did I ended here. My life was perfect, I had a job that I love, I got money I got the look and I had the love of my life.
But now even when I had everything the only thing that I really wanted and needed was her. Rose, my Rose.
It always was her, even if I didn't want to admit it all this years I tried to find her in every women that I met. When she left she took my heart away with her, so I never was complete, and now that piece may gone forever.
I shook my head, chasing away the dark thoughts that started to invade my mind. No, she will came back, her son need her, damn I need her like my next breath. I was so stupid to ever accuse her, to walk away without even let her explain. One thing my mother was right about, Where was my love when I accused her without even giving her the chance to say something.
If I had a time machine to go back and undo all my stupid actions I would do that in an eye blink but it can't happen and now I'm stuck here, not knowing what to do.
While I was having a pity party for myself the rain started, I looked up to the sky and let the rain drop hit my face, I tried to wash my the pain that I was feeling, but it just grow bigger. I knew that I just have to face reality but it was very hard, sometimes it's just to hard, but I need to do things right now.
I drove to the hospital even that I was socking wet, it's not important now what really mattered was Rose, I need to see her.
~~~~At the hospital~~~~~
I stood at her room door for about fifteen minutes, every time I came to visit her I feel a huge pain in my chest, it's like I'm searching for something that I will never find and that what cause me the pain. But deep inside I know that that something it's an excuse for me to have the right to visit her.
Pretty much confusing I know, but it's like I have to torture myself before I have a right to see her.
For my surprise she was awake, I cleared my throat and came closer. But as always no reaction. "Hi Rose, it's me Daniel, Uh I know that I shouldn't be her now but I came anyway." I know pathetic, but after I knew today what really happened I have a hard time speaking to her.
I don't know what to say. Past month I begged her to came back, I told her how much I love her. But now even for it makes me sick. I bet if she could speak she will send me where the sun don't shine.
I sat next to her and hugged her, I buried my face in the crock of her neck and breathed her sent. It was calming, she gave me strength even when she was like that.
" Rose I LOVE YOU, I know that somewhere there you can hear me. I know that you hate me, you have the right, and I was a jerk to never give you a chance, to believe my mother, those stupid photos,
I was a jerk a stupid stupid jerk. I know that my apologies are a little to late, and that you may never forgive me, but I'm begging you please give me a chance, one more chance."
I hugged her tighter still burying my face in the crock of her neck "Please trust me one more time.'' I felt her tense under my touch, I puled away just a bit to look at her and her eyes met mine. For seconds she held my gaze than looked away. I called her again and she looked at me, I was on the cloud nine, until she crushed every tiny hope I had.
"Who are you???"
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Trust one more timeRomance
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