What Happened To Forever?

Chapter Three

*****Billie's Point Of View*****

With a wreckless effort I swerved my car into the gas station parking lot, hopped out, and barged inside. The dude behind the counter backed away some as I rushed past him, into the back to the refridgrater thingys. I slung open the one that had a twelve pack of ice cold beer. I didn't care what brand. Beer is beer. Thats final.

I carried it to the front, paid in cash, gave the dude a tip, and barged right back out. Once I was seated in the car, I ripped a beer out, popped it open, and chugged the entire bottle down in one fluid motion. The liquid was bitter sweet, and was going to be the cure for the breaking of my heart. I took another bottle out, and chugged it also.

Soon I would be dizzy if I kept this up, and I wasn't a good driver when I drank. I sat the beer in the floor of the passenger side, and pulled a small switchblade out of my pocket. One little cut would keep me from drinking all twelve beers, which would keep me from getting in a car accident, or worse arrested. One little cut...

Yes I know I had an extremly terrible problem, but I wasn't willing to fix it because it made me happy when I was depressed. So screw anyone who thinks I need help. I pressed the warm blade to my skin, and slit as deep as I could. I gasped, dropping the knife under my feet somewhere. This cut had hurt like a motherfucker, but it made me smile. It also felt good.

Clutching my teeth from the sudden rush of pain, and sweetness, I pulled out of the parking lot, and was on the road back to the concert place. I couldn't wait to get their, load up in the tour bus, and be off again. Off to a new town, a fresh place, to make us well known. After this tour, all I had in mind was Kaela.

Would she still love me then? Would she still want to be my forever? Would she still even remember me? Or would she find someone better. I had to worry about all that, because God only knows she can do SO much better than me. The sucidial, walking contridiction that I am. Who would want me anyways, to deal with some basket case like me is going through hell daily.

I pushed the gas petal to the floor, speeding past everyone, having a long time ahead of me to drive. The rest of day was going to be hell, I could feel it burning in my bones.

*****Kaela's Point Of View*****

The house was dark, I hadn't felt like flicking on the lights quite yet. I had to talk to someone, I needed someone right now. I was still in shock with Jimmy's death, I barely could stomach thinking about it right now. I pulled out my almost forgotten cell phone, and dialed Jakes number without much feeling.

"Hello?" His voice had grown deeper, he sounded depressed, sad.

"Jacob?" I asked, my voice cracking, not sounding myself.

"Oh my God! Kaela? You're alive? Oh my God I thought I would NEVER hear your voice again?! Where have you been?!" Jacob ranted, his voice turning happier.

"Just please can you come over?" I whispered into the phone, a tear falling from my left eye.

"Yeah! I'm on my way." He shouted happily, the line going dead.

I needed him, he was my second best friend, and I couldn't lose another. I took a deep breath, standing on my unstable feet, and walking to the sink. I stared at myself in the tiny mirror, and seen a hidious sight. I bit my lip, and punched the mirrior. Shards shattering all in the sink, along with droplets of blood. It made the reflection mangled, just like the mirrior in Billie's dressing room did, I seen things the way he did now.

I shook my head, and turned away. I only had a few cuts, nothing major, I liked the numbing pain. It made the tears dry up, and my heart beat normally. I took in a deep breath, leaning against the counter. Right now I needed to know where my mom was, was she alive, was she gone? If she was...I didn't have nobody but Billie if he even cared.

Maybe Jake knew something, maybe she was just staying at a friends, maybe she was busy at work. Maybe I was just being paranoid. I couldn't even bare to keep my eyes open at the moment, so I closed them, sinking down onto my knees. I was crying again, it was hard to stop when I really had no one these days to hold onto. Everyone was leaving me, all I had left was Jake, really.

A loud knock interuppted my break down, and I stood on my unstable feet, dragging myself to the door, and opening it. His deep brown eyes were filled with worry, and sadness. His brown hair looked a complete wreck, probably not touched in a few days. He looked dead in his skin, and wasn't the Jacob I had seen only days ago. Four or five days ago.

"Kaela!" He whispered, his voice hoarse, and wrapped me in his long arms.

His hug was warm, he is my teddy bear, always there when I needed him. I hoped he was never going to leave me alone in this cold world, without Billie, I really had no one. Except for Jake.

"Jacob..."I trailed off, feeling tears drip onto his chilled, Hollywood Undead hoodie.

"Where have you been? What happened between Jimmy, and you? Why haven't you called? Oh my God, I'm so glad your okay." He swarmed me with questions, making me pull away, looking at my feet in rememberance.

"He...died." I whispered, backing into the kitchen.

Jake's eyes were huge, taking this new information in, and closing the door behind him.

"I'm so sorry, Kaela." He muttered, following me in the kitched, taking my hand in his harmlessly.

I shook my head, and stared at the wall.

"Have you heard from my mom?" I wondered, changing the subject, making him shake his head.

"No, not at all." He answered, worry in his tone.

"Shit, I have to find out why she hasn't been home, or even called to worry about me..." I trailed off, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"What?" He shouted, clearly taken off guard.

"Yeah..."

"She can work all the time, ignore you, but she can't pretend your not even alive." He growled, clenching his fists.

"Calm down, Jake. Maybe something happened." I suggested, holding his waist, hoping my touch could calm him.

Luckily it did, and he sighed nodding.

"So how has it been while I was gone?" I wondered, looking up at him from under my lashes.

"...Well Karly broke up with me when I started to get really out of it when you weren't back when you were supposed to be. I've been worried sick, and she says that I have a thing for you, when I don't. I just love my friends, my best friend." He explained, shaking his head, taking a seat at the kitchen table.

"Wow that is really shitty...I uhm...am engaged."I blurted, twirling my curly chocolate colored hair.

"...To?"

"Billie Joe Armstong." I replied, acting normal.

His mouth dropped, and he shook his head.

"The lead singer of Green Day?"

"Yes."

He lifted his hand up for a high five, and I slapped it hard with a smile on my lips.

"Nice..." He complimented, standing.

"Yeah I love him." I admitted sheepishly, making him turn away.

"I was wanting to get something off my chest but..."He trailed off, staring out the window.

"Tell me."

"Kaela...I've liked you a little more than a friend since we met." He told me, staring into my eyes.

"Oh..."

"But I'm over it, don't worry." He smiled, making his way into the living room.