After the thing that happened in music class which was two weeks ago, Clyde has been keeping distance from me which I find really weird. Anyway, while that's happening, it's the opposite for River. He rarely leaves my side except for our different classes. I have a guess that because of River always sticking to me like a gum, Clyde has no chance in going near me since I think almost everyone thinks River and I are already together. But sadly, we're not. I haven't answered him yet. I'm still undecided. I need time. More time.

    At lunch, Janna and I finally got to have sister bonding. She had managed to convince River to let me spend some time with her. Right now, there is a question I've been itching to ask Janna. It's been awhile.

    "Janna? I want you to be honest with me. Ok?"

    "Yeah sure," she said as she chewed her clubhouse sandwich.

    "After you have swallowed your food, please?"

    She wiped her mouth with her paper towel. "Shoot."

    "I know you and River are not in good terms. Could we like talk about it?" I asked her, hoping that she would give me the answer I want. She doesn't answer for a moment. I tried again. "We're best friends right? And we always share our secrets. Please, Janna? I wanna understand."

    She looked at me, her eyes lingering into mine as if they have the answers she needed. Finally, after she sighed. "Okay, just don't get mad."

    "I promise I won't. Trust me on this."

    "I like River even until now. I know that you two have this thing going on lately and I know I'm not going to let my feelings come between you two. I'm trying as hard as I can to forget how I feel about him because of you. Blaire, you are my best friend aka my sister and as much as possible, I really don't want to hurt you. I know this sounds awkward but it's the truth and I'm so sorry."

    I was taken aback by her words. 

    "I know that part of you hates me for telling you this, but I really am so sorry," she continued. "I admit, I was really jealous of you when River kept on looking for you or even mentioning your name in front of me whenever only River and I are alone. I really really hated you back then. But then, I realized I was being a b*tch for making myself feel that way towards you. Blaire, I'm so soo sorry."

     I was still silent.

    "Blaire? Why aren't you talking?" she looked at me with watery eyes and her voice is starting to get a little shaky. I just realized that I wasn't looking at her while she was apologizing to me and that right now, her voice is cracking and her tears were about to fall from her eyes. "I completely understand that this thing is unforgivable but—"

    I hugged her to keep her from sobbing. "It's alright, Janna. Shhh, it's ok. You're forgiven." I rubbed my hand up and down her back to calm her. Janna was still saying sorry. Likewise, I was still telling her that she's forgiven and that everything is alright. After letting her drink water, I started.

    "Janna, thanks for being honest with me," I said and gave her a small smile. She looked at me with hopeful eyes. "Janna, you're my best friend slash my sister from another mother. Of course I'd forgive you! And also, I understand how you feel and if I were you, I would have done the same thing." 

    Both of us laughed in my last statement. Then, Janna gave me one last hug. "Blaire! I love you and thank you!" Her tears of joy are falling on my t-shirt and trust me, it was one of the best feelings ever.

    "You know what, let's make a deal, forget about all of this and move on. Less drama, the happier we'll be—even though we both know you still like River."

    "Actually, Blaire, I think I've got over him," Janna said happily as I follow her gaze to Clyde. "It's a deal."

     With that, my heart sank unexpectedly.

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