Go Your Own Way

''Loving you isn't the right thing to do.'' Jack held Rose's gaze; their eyes unwavering. The words should have pierced right to both their hearts. Perhaps in a way it did. When the realisation had come some months prior, it had shattered them; their beautiful illusion and the life which Jack had tried so hard to create for them both. A world in which they would exist free and alive.

''I know.'' Rose agreed, her hands upon a small duffle bag which had come to be in her possession during the three years that she and Jack had been together, wondering the far corners of America together and then they had taken the decision to explore France. ''I need to settle, somehow, somewhere.''

''I know.'' Whilst he had come to resent it at first, now, there was an acceptance.

''You came into my life at a time when I needed you the most, this brilliant beacon of light.''

He offered his hand to her and helped her over the grassy verge wordlessly. She stood a few feet in front of him both of them lost for words in one way or another. His eyes searched her face and he recognised that far away, lost look which she had worn for a week or so. Even longer than that now that he recalled. ''And you were happy for some time.''

''So were you.''

Their eyes met, recalling a time when their happiness was untouchable. Now, they awoke separately and spend their days taking part in different activities.

''How did you find your way?''

Rose pressed her lips together. ''I asked for a carriage to bring me. Monet's house isn't a place where people ask to visit but then I saw you laid down here.''

Jack thrust his hands into his pocket. Rose glanced around; she hadn't seen just how beautiful the countryside was until she had taken to moment to stop panicking. Stop, to think of anything else but the new course which her life was about to take.

For Jack, he had never seen anything so beautiful. Until her. The house and garden were dull in comparison to her beauty. He needed to speak to her and to know what was on her mind. She could feel his eyes on him and didn't know when to start talking.

''You hurt me, Jack.'' She whispered. ''But I had no reason to feel that in any way. I knew who you were from the start and somehow, I started to resent that over time, without a right.''

Jack glanced to the floor. Her words pierced his heart. ''Rose, they were my friends. I know they were so... open and I appreciate that. But I never loved them, I only wanted you.'' He stepped closer to her but she seemed to flinch. ''I draw them, Rose. I have always simply been that person.''

Tears brimmed in her eyes, Rose knew why she came here and she focused on that matter alone. He knew too, he was sure of it, but it still wasn't less emotional to face it. To face any of it.

''I am leaving.'' She spoke confidently, swallowing the lump in her throat. ''I am not leaving for you but for myself.''

Jack nodded as he watched her play with the flowery stitching upon her dress.

''I know that.'' Jack cocked his head, watching as she was summoned into some deep, dark, emotional place but he kept on. ''Where will you go?''

''I plan to go to London.'' She nodded her head as though she was convincing herself that this was the right thing to do. ''I need to make some arrangements.''

Rose hadn't the faintest idea of what to do or how to even make such plans but she needed to learn. Jack knew he couldn't change her mind no matter how much he pleaded nor could he offer to go with her knowing full well she wouldn't want him there. Truth was, he wasn't sure what he could offer her anymore, nor her to him. Jack was never to settle; happiest when racing about the world in a way that he had always known. Rose, after three years of travel, needed to settle. She needed a steady job, needing a home, perhaps children. He feared that was what she wished for the most and it was fear which was instilled within him which made him allow her to go.