My Soldier (Bucky Barnes)

The Misadventures of Shopping

TW: Mentions of Suicidal attempt and SA

-BUCKY POV-

Natsya drove us to a mall close to the compound. The ride had been short but she seemed to enjoy it while some songs blasted over the radio. It was really refreshing to see her get happy over small things as if she had found joy in everything around her. She pulled up the car at the parking lot and we both stepped out of the vehicle. She soon hurried us both into the mall. Although we had some problems with the metal detector, she handled it well being an avenger. "Well Bucky which store would ya like to go?" she asked me as I looked around in wonder. There had been many stores on each floor with colorful clothes over mannequins at the display window. "Wow", that was all I could say. We walked into a store called 'H&M', strange name but the clothes around there had been quite good. We headed towards the men section and and Natsya started pulling out some clothes for me then walked towards me. Her covered arms carried a huge bunch of clothes and handed them to me. "Now go try these. Let me know if they aren't your size." I stared into the pile for a  while and then headed to the dressing rooms. 

The room was small but enough for a person to change their clothes in. I changed into outfit number one: black denims, white shirt and a brown leather jacket. I looked into the mirror and was surprised to see myself look so different yet so me. I was genuinely happy about it. I opened the door to try to get Natsya to approve the look. I searched around for her in the store and saw her looking at a short beige dress. It had thin shoulder straps and was a fitted one. The various floral designs made it look even prettier. I was so engrossed in looking at her that I didn't realize I had been letting all my weight over a small pile of clothes on a counter. The sound of them falling seemed to bring her attention towards me. She smiled as she walked over to me. "Whoa Bucky this looks good. The size fits perfectly too." "Thanks, uhhh that dress looks good too. Wanna try it out?" I asked her. She looked a bit flustered and started tugging and pulling at the log sleeves of her top before speaking. "Uhhh its not that good... Nat got me a lot of dresses so... By the way, we are here for you, not for me so I'm not buying any clothes." I just nodded. After a while of more changing of clothes, we decided to buy them all along with a few t-shirts and sweatpants for everyday use and some gym wear too. There had been seven shopping bags with us already. She suggested at taking me to buy me some shoes. I couldn't say no to that. The shoes I wore everyday had been my mission shoes, I wanted to get rid of everything that HYDRA had ever given me. Everything, except Natsya.

After heading to a few more stores for shoes, we decided to have some lunch and headed to a pizza place. The pizza had been good would be an understatement, it was heavenly. We picked up our bags again and decided to head back to the compound. We had just gotten off the elevator when a kid came up to us and asked for a picture with Natsya. I had figured that the kid was a fan of hers. "Hello, I'm Robbie. Can I take a picture with you?" the little boy asked. That seemed to set something off in her. Her entire body language changed. I could hear her breathing erratically as she looked at the boy with fear. "Hey you good?", I asked her softly as I held her hand. "Natsya? Listen to me. Control your breathing. In... Out... In... Out.." I tried at calming her down but it won't work. "Shit", I heard her mutter under her breath. Suddenly, she dropped all the shopping bags and ran towards other side of the place. "Natsya!" I called out for her but she didn't look back at me. I looked back at the kid who looked a little frightened by the whole thing. I just couldn't leave him standing there like that without his parents around him. I crouched down to his level and spoke with him. "Did I do something wrong?" he asked in his soft and innocent voice. "No bud, you did nothing. My friend isn't feeling well right now. Maybe we'll meet you again sometime?" "How?" "Remember she's an Avenger so she can find and meet you when she feels all good." The kid smiled at it and then nodded before leaving to get to his parents. I then got up from my crouched position and went towards where she had run away. 

After 30 minutes of searching, I still had no luck at spotting her. I brought out my phone which Steve had given me at the therapist's office and quickly dialed his contact. I was a quick learner unlike him. The line rang for a few seconds till I heard his voice. "Hello" "Steve, its me Bucky" "Hey Buck. How is the shopping going-" "Natsya ran away somewhere" I said cutting him off. "Wait, what do you mean?" "She- she just ran away. She seemed scared. Steve I am scared for her- I looked for her but she's just not there anywhere-" "Buck listen, calm down and tell me what happened." I told him the entire thing with the kid. "Oh fuck." "Steve?" "Sorry, I'm just heading there with others ok? You guys still at the mall right?" "Yes but what's happening Steve?" "Bucky, I promise I'll tell you but not right now." "What the hell..." "Alright we are here, where are you?" "First floor near the pizza place." "Alright" with that he cut the call. I had dumped the bags in the car when had gone searching for her in the parking lot so I was free of luggage. 

I saw Steve, Sam, Natasha and Wanda heading towards me. They all knew what was going on but why were they hiding it from me? "Where did you see her go?" Natasha asked me with a stern look, I knew it wasn't for me but it still scared me. "She headed that way", I say pointing towards her direction. "We split up. Buck you stay near the car incase she comes there and if she does, call me", Steve instructed. "Sam you got Redwing?" "Obviously" "Look for her in the crowds. Nat you come with me and Wanda try to look for her with her mind and thoughts." They all headed towards their places. I waited outside the car for the next fifteen minutes till Steve came in with others. "Where is she?" I asked them. "She's not here", Natasha said. "Sam did you check well?" Wanda asked. "Could you here her thoughts?" "I couldn't-" "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!", I shouted. "Nobody is telling me what is happening. I am scared for her too but how will I find her if I'm clueless about the whole thing!" At this Sam, Steve and Wanda looked down. "I think we should tell him, Steve", Nat spoke softly. He nodded and looked up to face me. "Buck what I'm gonna tell you is disturbing but you deserve to know..." he paused and looked at Wanda. "What is it Steve?" I asked him with concern and fear laced into my tone. "Three months back, Ana was kept out of the field and mission because.." he paused unable to speak the unknown event as if it haunted him to even think about it. "Because she had tried to commit suicide." 

A/N: Sorry for short chapter I got my exams so I'm managing to write as much as I can. Also, I've been thinking of smut probably in next two chapters *wink*. Do comment to let me know if I should do one and thankyou for endless support<33