• 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 𝐈𝐕 •

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"Oh my God! Mum don't move just let me grab the broom-" I try to reason, doing the practical thing when glass shatters.

As I get up and move, my Mum grabs my wrists in a harsh manner, her hands trembling as she looked at my face with an expression more serious than I have ever seen.

"What did he tell you?" She asked, her eyes piercing into my own.

I didn't say a word and instead focused on her facial expressions to try and read her mind. I couldn't tell what she was thinking, but the utter fear in her eyes was undeniable.

She is fucking terrified.

Her eyes morphed from fear to realisation. She took a shuddery breath and released my wrists from her iron grip, her shaky hands covering her mouth.

"You know." Mum muttered out, like her worst fear had come true. By the look in her face, it just might've been.

I knew nothing, but I just knew that I would uncover this earth shattering secret if I played along.

"Yeah. I know everything." I said, trying to sound as sure of myself as I could.

My mum then stepped over the glass as carefully as she could, grabbing me by the hands this time in a gentle way, her hands still slightly shaking.

She sat me down on the couch and took my hands into my own, her eyes becoming glossy with tears.

"Listen, Dahliah." She began, scaring me as she almost always calls me 'Dolly' unless I'm in trouble or it's serious.

"I was going to wait until you were older, but you already know, so you deserve the full truth. Just know I love you so very much and nothing in the world can change that, okay?" Mum assured me, briefly caressing my face.

I nodded and with that, my understanding of my life was flipped on its back.

"Me and your father were a...toxic couple. Always on and off, all throughout college. One night, we had a massive fight and we broke up. Again. I was in tears, crying my heart out as I walked back to my dorm when a man noticed me crying and gave me his shoulder to cry on."

I felt a pit in my stomach grow as I begin to dream the worst.

"I was so out of it, without thinking I leaned in and kissed him. It was college, I was reckless and stupid, so one thing led to another and we...did it." She mumbled clearly ashamed.

No, no, no, no!!!

"He left in the morning without notice and your father and I got back together 3 days later.  A few weeks after that, I found out I was pregnant with you and everything changed. When Terry found out, he wanted to know if it was his and I just wanted a stable family with your father, so I never told him. He was always paranoid and when you were 13, he had a DNA test done to confirm his suspicions." She said grimly.

I felt like I had been shot.

I immediately stood up and held on to the corner of the couch to hold myself up. A million thoughts are racing through my head.

That's why my dad hates me. I'm not his fucking kid.

"TERRY SILVER IS MY FUCKING DAD?!" I yell in shock and horror.

My Mum looks confused, but then realised that I tricked her into telling me about something I was meant to know about.

"D-Dahliah you shou-shouldn't have tricked me." She shakily states, trying to be firm.

I scoffed and then laughed. "I tricked you?! Why would you keep this from me?!" I screamed, by emotions raw.

Emotions with me usually go hand in hand. When I'm angry, I'm sad. It's like an automatic thing, so I've never really had one emotion that charges me.

But now, all I felt was anger.

"YOU FUCKING LIAR! YOU'RE THE ONE PERSON WHO IS SUPPOSED TO PROTECT ME, SHOW ME HOW TO BE A GOOD PERSON!!" I yelled, angry as ever.

My Mum was crying, guilt all over her face. "D-Dolly, I-" she stuttered.

"INSTEAD, YOU GOT KNOCKED UP, LIED TO YOUR HUSBAND, LET HIM WALK ALL OVER YOU FOR YEARS AND THEN HAVE HIM HATE ME BECAUSE YOU WERE STUPID! NOW I HAVE NO DAD AND NOTHING CLOSE TO IT BECAUSE OF YOU, SO FUCK YOU!" I scream, breathing heavily as I let everything out.

I have never in the entirety of my life felt a raw emotion. I've never felt a feeling consume me entirely to the point where it's all I feel, see and am. But I did now.

I'm so fucking angry.

I stormed out of the living room, ignoring the pleads of my mother and slammed the front door shut as I frantically escaped from the house.

I had that feeling in my chest again, it's an indication of a panic attack. But this time, I didn't feel scared or overwhelmed by panic; I just felt so mad.

I lose sight of where I'm walking and before I even know it, I'm in the local park, storming through as my jaw clenched my mouth shut and my feet engraved the ground with each step.

I turn to the public bathroom and race in, closing the door behind me as fast as possible.

Nobody is treating me right. I have done everything in my power to try and be a good person. I've apologised for everything I've done, I've shown forgiveness when I didn't need to, I've trusted people and respected them with every fibre of my being.

But it did nothing.

I cried out as I punched the side of the toilet cubicle, again and again and again. I couldn't feel anything in my hand until I noticed the gushing red blood flowing down my knuckle.

I pulled away to see the blood-stained dent in the cubicle wall and felt that feeling still there, like an elephant sitting on my chest.

It was the same feeling that I felt when Sam betrayed me, when Eli fought me at the school fight, when Tory chose Cobra Kai over everything and the entire day of the All Valley.

Why can't anyone treat me like I matter?!!

The anger turned into rage, and that rage threw my fist into the wall, breaking the wall and creating a hole.

I breathed heavily as I expected some kind of relief, like the anger had gone away. But it stayed there, and it wanted me to destroy everything in sight.

In that moment, I wanted to burn everything.
________________________________
A/N
heyyy guys 😚😚

new season, then after season 6, it's all over 😨😭

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check out my Spotify and TikTok, (@lilacwp) like this 👑 right here:

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𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 {𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘣𝘳𝘢 𝘬𝘢𝘪}Tempat cerita menjadi hidup. Temukan sekarang