T(H)RUST - Ghost x Reader

Chapter 21

"Please?"

You close your eyes and take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself down. His voice just does something to you, and you can't bring yourself to ignore it. You grab the door and open it back up. He is looking down at the ground and as you pull the door open he looks up, staring straight into your eyes. The coldness in them is gone, but you don't trust them, they could change at any moment. You cross your arms over your chest, putting up a physical barrier to try and keep the emotional one strong

"What do you want?" You try to be as cold as possible. "To fuck, then leave?"

You can see his eyes darken, then he looks down.

"I just want to talk. Give me five minutes."

You let out a sigh.

"You get four."

He looks up at you again, then his gaze shifts to looking into your apartment.

"Can I?" he says, motioning with his hand that he would like to come inside. You step aside, making space for him and he walks in.

He makes his way to the couch and sits down, the TV is still on. You feel quite irritated at how he simply walks in like he owns the place. You consider offering him something to drink, but you decide he doesn't deserve that kindness. Walking over to the couch, you make sure to act tough, stopping when you are a few feet away.

"Your time is ticking."

He sighs and clasps his hands together, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his thighs. He looks unusually tense.

"Johnny's heart stopped in the car on the way to the hospital. I did heart compressions until we got there. He almost died"

You feel a knot tighten in your throat. Soap had been in a bad state when he was in your room, but you didn't know it had been that close.

"I punched Alejandro in the face. I drove after those cartel members without good reason. I didn't answer when Price called, and if I had, we could have been at the house faster, and maybe avoid Johnny getting shot." he takes a deep breath before continuing. "Price talked to me at the hospital, he said I had become unfocused. One more mistake and someone would end up dead."

He starts to fidget with his hands, rubbing his thumb over the other one.

"He told me I had to remove any distractions, otherwise, I would have to get off the team."

"And what does that have to do with this whole thing?" you say, waving your hands around in front of you to show you are talking about what's happening right now.

"You are my distraction."

What he says startles you, and you have to think for an extra second before speaking.

"Then it was for the better that I left, right. Why did you come here?"

"To apologize." his voice sounds broken.

You think back to him ignoring you, pulling you off him when you tried to give him a hug, ordering you out of his room, and when he looked at you and called you a hooker. An apology would not help with anything, but he could try.

"And what made you want to do that?"

"You make me feel something that I've never felt before." He takes a deep breath. "I thought I was crazy, but it felt like maybe you felt the same way about me. I didn't have the balls to reject you.. but the team is everything I've known for years, so I tried to make you hate me. When you said you were in love with me before you went home, I knew I had made a mistake and I—"