the secrets we shared | rowan laslow x reader

chapter viii

as soon as he kissed me, he vanished. i know i should be horrified by the fact that creep kissed me, but the kiss just felt so right. i skip back to my room, feeling giddy, and sneak back in. bianca is still asleep, luckily, and something has taken my mind off of that horrid monster. i fall into a deep sleep, and wake up late the next morning. almost as soon as i wake up, i remember what happened during the night, and feel the same excitement.

bianca can instantly tell something is different - maybe because of the fact i was skipping to class - and asks what happened. but when i go to tell her, i pause. what did the kiss mean? does he not like wednesday? and when we get into class, rowan acts as if i am completely invisible. ouch.

this goes on for days, until its the day where your parents visit the school. as my parents live in england, i am the only person without parents there. or so i thought. looking around for rowan, i don't see him. "his mother died a few years ago, so he tends to avoid parent activities" bianca explains to me. and i know exactly where to find him.

i storm into the library, furious. sure enough, he's in there with his head stuck in a book. "okay what the fuck" i say, annoyed. rowan looks up and goes red, looking for ways to leave. "i said i was sorry"
"sorry for what?" i ask, genuinely confused. "you know" he replies, looking like he wants the ground to swallow him whole.
"what, leading me on, giving me mixed signals or being an overall creep?"
"what?" he stares at me through his glasses. "i didnt lead you on! !" "right because kissing me and then completely ghosting me for the next few days isnt leading me on."
"oh"

we stand in silence for a few moments, unsure of what to say. i feel slightly uncomfortable, as i hate to admit it but i am scared of him. i try to go over what happened that night, but i still can't remember. the only thing i can do is ask, i suppose. i take a deep breath, before breaking the silence
"what happened at the festival?". he looks at me for a long time, looking thoughtful, before saying: "i don't know". helpful. "yes you do. i remember chasing you and wednesday and then there was a monster, and everything went dark. and bianca said you carried me out of the woods unconscious, so you have a lot of explaining." i say, realising accusing him like this in the middle of the night with no one around is very dangerous, but its too late now.
"no i am serious, i do not know what happened. one minute i am in the woods with wednesday, then a monster tries to attack me, but instead flies away and hits a tree. at the same time, you screamed then fell"
this sounds familiar, and i don't think he is lying about anything. wait. "was i the one who knocked the monster out?"
"i don't know. i don't see how or why, but theres no other way." i gasp, remembering the smaller details from that day. "i remember seeing you and wednesday run into the woods, and feeling angry because i thought you wanted to meet me. and then i remember seeing a monster running towards you, and i felt something indescribable when it took hold of you"
rowan stares at me and i realise how cringey that sounded. but its true. "i wasn't running into the woods with wednesday, i was running away from her." he replies, looking a little bit confused. "away? i thought you liked her" rowan stares at me bewildered from this comment. "what?" he opens his mouth to say something else, but closes it.