𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 | 𝐠𝐮𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐞

⁰⁷ | First-day shitters

"Yeah, and you knew what I meant by that."

I see his shoulders sink as he lets out a deep breath. He turns to me, finally. "Honestly, M, I didn't think you'd want to know."

"You didn't think I'd want to know?" I repeat with a bit of a scoff. "Of course, I want to know, Adam."

"Let me ask you this," he says, grabbing my wrist and pulling me to sit next to him on my bed. "What would you have done if I did tell you?"

I think for a moment. I don't know. I literally don't know what I would have done because I didn't think it would ever happen.

"That's why I didn't tell you," Adam fills my silence. "I know how much it would bother you, and I didn't want it messing with your head while you're supposed to be out there getting away from all this."

I frown. How come he always had to be right? How come everyone around me has to be right all the time? "It sucks how good of a best friend you are."

"I know. I wanted to tell you, though."

I shrug. "Will you tell me now?"

"What do you want to know?"

"Everything, really. When did they get back together?"

"It's hard to tell, honestly," he answers. "It was a while after you left, though. They were so on and off all of last year. They fought, like, all the time. It really put a damper on the mood for the rest of us."

"What was the fighting about?" I ask.

"No idea. Half the time, it was like they were fighting just to fight. It's like they didn't have anything good to say to each other sometimes, and that was better than saying nothing at all."

"Wow, that makes me sound like a Saint."

He grins at me, the small gaps that used to be in between his teeth are gone. "Nah, you're still the Devil stuck in a five-foot-three body."

I roll my eyes. "You really shouldn't be allowed to be this tall. It makes you cocky."

He laughs and places his fingers to my wrist. His hand is cold, or maybe I'm just really warm.

"I missed this," Adam whispers. "Just like, being able to feel your heartbeat. It really wasn't the same without you."

"I missed this, too," I agree. "California was a lot more fun when all you were there."

"Hey, Maeve?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay? You know with Guy and Connie?"

I shrug, and it feels like the most honest thing I've ever done. "I probably should have expected it, right? I mean, I left. I asked him to hate me. Can't really expect him to wait around forever, can I?"

"You can still be upset."

"But I can't," I mumble, thinking out loud more than telling. "I can't be upset at him for moving on when I left him--when he probably needed me most. I can't be upset because I let him go."

"You can still be upset," Adam repeats. "You guys had something real. Like, really real. He was yours first."

"But he's not anymore."

I really don't feel like talking about it anymore. It's too hard to tell myself how fair he was to himself when all I want to do is tell him how unfair it was for him to move on when I hadn't. I think Adam got that. He did most things.

"Charlie is supposed to come over tonight," Adam tells me.

"For what?" I grin.

It's funny how fast my mood can change when it comes to Adam and Charlie. It's impossible to be mad when you're talking about those two.