Chapter X

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For four days we repeat shooting, knife throwing, fighting. I win my fights, not the one against Molly though, after which I end up with a very painful shoulder. Luckily my left one, so that I could continue to shoot. Eric hasn't said a word to me or looked at me, except once. When I train in the mornings and he sees me, he ignores me. The only thing he does is glare when I talk with Tobias. Or train with him. He still wins. Always. Rather easily. But I get more hits in than before and it annoys him very much.

We went to the fence one afternoon, and the entire trip consisted mostly of him telling us that half of us will end up here with boring days and bad work hours. We mused about what could be out there, from monsters to nothing, everything was vividly discussed among the initiates.

I on the other hand walked a few metres away and look out at the fields.

"You are going to miss the train back initiate", Eric said and I ignored him at first.

"Do you think there is the ocean somewhere? I read about it. It is supposed to be beautiful and destructive at the same time. I'd love to see it", I mused and Eric looked at me with something in his eyes that wasn't anger, or annoyance, or irritation.

"Maybe someday."

Right now it is Friday morning, 5:30 am and I sit at the table, eating muesli. My brother sits opposite me, eating cake. I do not know where he gets it from at 5 in the morning, but consider me jealous.

"Up for another fight today?", he questions.

"Always am. Uriah said that we will fight them?"

My brother nods.

"But seeing you fighting with me...you'll stand a chance."

I nod. Sammy almost flipped when he saw my new hair, Uriah only took a champagne-coloured strand in between his fingers and nodded in approval. Lynn didn't say anything about it. My brother's reaction was somewhat like Uriah's too.

We finish our breakfast and walk to the training room side by side. My back is now bandage-free, but still a little sore.

I put my hair into a low, very short ponytail and we start with our new routine training. Exercise for my muscles then hits on the bags and finally one on one fighting. I can now do nine pull-ups.

I am just, once again, pinned beneath my brother, gasping for air.

"Eric kissed me", I blurt out. Tobias' eyes widen and I flip us over, him now pinned under me.

"He what?", he growls and basically throws me across the mat.

"Five days ago."

"Did he force himself on you?!"

"No! No, it kinda just happened. And he has ignored me since."

"So you kissed him?"

"Kinda...yeah."

"I told you to stay away!"

"And I did", I huff, "it is not like I planned it."

"He knows that this is prohibited!"

"Oh and your little crush on Tris? It's not as if you wouldn't like to kiss her", I grumble as we once again topple to the ground.

"That is different. I would never just do it."

"Well, as said he has ignored me since, so no worries."

"Yeah, that's good."

"Yes, good", I mumble, distracted for a moment and my brother has me locked onto the ground.

"Torturing an initiate that early Four?", a mocking voice says and I roll my eyes.

"It's called training, Eric."

"She doesn't really seem like your type, Four."

My brother growls. "Yes, but she is yours apparently?"

I stand up, dusting myself off and feel Eric's eyes wander up and down my body.

"If it weren't for her face, she'd be really hot."

"Right here, asshole, right here", I grumble.

"Do not talk about her like that", Tobias defends me, taking a step forward. I place my hand on his upper arm for only a second, causing him to glance at me.

"He only likes to provoke. Ignore it. He's not worth it."

And at that Eric's eyes narrow to slits and he stalks towards me, I step towards him, our noses centimetres apart.

"Watch what you are saying, initiate."

"Or what", I hiss, "you'll kiss me again?"

I see the raising of his hand, feel it almost. That familiarity of trying to shrink back to make the blow less painful. But this time my hand shoots up and catches his wrist.

"If you dare to raise your hand to me", I growl, "then I will kill you in your sleep."

Eric smirks, his second hand on my throat so fast I couldn't see it.

"I'd love to see you try", he says and let's go, turning his attention to Four, "teach her some lessons in obedience."

Simply that one word makes my face lose all its colour, I am sure because I can barely stand as my hands begin shaking. Eric marches out of the room, I crumble to the floor, desperately trying to get my breathing under control. To get air into my lungs at all. Warm arms envelop me in a hug and I am pressed against my brother's chest.

"Deep breaths, just like me. You can feel my chest rise and fall, just do the same. Focus only on that."

And I do, focus on his breathing, his heartbeat and five minutes later, I can finally breathe.

"Good. Very good."

"Sorry, I just, I..."

"No need to explain", my brother smiles and moves away from behind me, offering me a hand.


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