Murder Is Scary But Band Members Are Scarier

Warped Tour Part 2

"Alright, kids, I get it. That was hilarious. Ha ha. You all can stop laughing now." They just stared at me and continued to laugh.

"If you don't stop, you'll never get to whatever the hell you want to do next."

"Okay, okay," Oliver said, still laughing. "Hannah, what's next on the schedule?" She looked, then squealed like a damn pig.

"It's Falling In Reverse's signing!"

"MY HUSBAND!"

And Hannah and Oliver started sprinting in one direction, and Jake ran after them. Oh my fucking god.

I started to speed walk after them, but I was too slow, so I began to run. But that slowed me down even more because after about two steps, I was out of breath and had to stop. I was bent down with my hands on my knees, breathing really hard. I thought, this is the end, Richard. You're finally dying. Then I thought that I didn't really want to die at fucking Warped Tour from just trying to run after my kids, so I pushed myself to move forward.

"Hey, Richard. You okay, man? You look like you're dying!" I looked over and Robb was standing there with his arms crossed and a huge grin on his face. He was laughing at me. Bret was standing next to him, looking rather like Hannah did when she was getting impatient with me.

"Yeah. I just can't run too well anymore."

"I hear ya, man. I was never able to run well." Robb laughed at his own comment.

"Yeah, I probably was never able to run well either." He laughed again. He laughs too much. I was scared.

"Where you headed to, old man?"

"Trying to find my kids. They're heading over to a signing. For Reverse And Falling, I think."

"You mean Falling In Reverse? I hate their fucking lead singer. Ryan's cool though. Hey, you met him! Remember?"

"Oh yeah I remember..." How could I forget someone weird like that?

"Cool. I would walk over with you, but I got some shit to do! Have fun, man. And don't run."

"Yeah, yeah." He slapped me on the back again and walked away.

I continued at a slow pace in the direction my kids went in. I started to think that, maybe if I went slow enough, I wouldn't make it to the signing and I'd save myself some emotional pain for the day, but then I remembered that Oliver was obsessed with that one guy and I didn't want anyone getting arrested. And Ryan gets shot in the head sometimes and I didn't want anyone to die.

I finally saw a long line of people facing a tent with the words "Falling In Reverse" at the top. Before I could join my kids, I saw the ridiculous pedophile again and had to hide. Once he passed by, I tried to find my kids. The people in this line were a bit taller than the ones in the crowd for The Relapse Symphony so I had a harder time trying to spot Oliver. I stood there, probably looking stupid, until I finally noticed my three kids waving at me. I went over to them.