HOW TO UNCRUSH ; hwang hyunjin

01. 09' Summer

During the summer of 2009, Sora turned nine.

Golden haze of afternoon sun glazed the roads in evaporating dreams. The girl had beads of sweat trickling down her neck. They were dismissed early that Thursday, so gathering the will to walk all the way back to her home was quite hard. With her hands clasping hard onto the strap of her backpack, she pushed her unwilling legs under the bare sky. Her lucky charm was making a little sound with each step. This was possibly the only thing that made her continue her journey. She glanced at it, the pink of it shimmering and blinking at her. Her mother had told her of the powers this little thing held. She felt encased into the world of the charm. It gave her that little needed strength for her little growing soul.

There was a blue walled candy shop at the very end of the road. Sora had a few coins in her pocket, and a clear destination in mind. She was craving something sweet. Sweet enough to reach the crevices of her cavities (and her brain). With pure determination on face, she skipped ahead, until-

-until she saw the cornered boy, huddled in the dark alley, tears on his cheeks. His eyes burned into the ones of his snickering opponents. Sora stood dead in her track. They made too many snarky remarks. One would keep kicking the fallen boy's feet, daring him to get up and fight. On her birthday someone was possibly living in their nightmare.

"Hey!" Sora interrupted. No one turned to look at her. She realised how her fear had eaten up her voice.

She was about to shout once more, but there was a shift in the written chapters. The fallen boy lunged on the tall one. The dust from the ground danced all around. Too many cheers and chuckles were being shared. The pair fell, squirming to gain the upper hand. Sora was wincing at how silly the fight looked. Boys.

So far no one had noticed her being the newly added audience to the show. The tall one was on the ground, the boy Sora was rooting for on the top. She was rooting for him until he punched his opponent right on his lips. Blood. Nine year old children weren't meant to fight each other till blood spill. She was taken aback. She shouted louder this time.

"Stop it!"

The boy looked at her, the rage of his eyes dying at the sight of her. She noticed the mole sitting beneath his gaze. She hated herself for that moment, because the one who was looking at her with such a swirl in his eyes was now on the receiving end of the brutal hits the whole group sent for him. He fell on the ground, his knees close to his chest. In the midst of this he never tore his sight away from her. Sora wished she could shout again. You idiot! Protect yourself!

She didn't.

Sora turned nine, and she ate the chocolate cake at 9pm when her parents came home from their work. Despite smiling hard in the pictures, she sensed guilt sit in her chest for the first time in her life. Suddenly her birthday tasted sour.

Three days passed in a blink. Sora was in her classroom when there was a knock on the door. She was busy drawing circles on her drawing sheet, until a low hum of exchanged whispering buzzed around.

"He has got stitches." One said. "Bruises too." Other added.

Sora looked up. She wished she didn't.

"Class, please welcome Hyunjin. He used to study in grade A, but we decided to shift him to your class now. Make sure you all get along with him, okay?" Mrs Ahra looked down at him smiling. She patted his back in encouragement. "Where do you want to sit?"

Hyunjin didn't say anything. His eyes travelled over the desks, avoiding the curious sights. Sora felt her chest hurt when he stopped beside her desk. He slowly looked up, his eyes finding hers. Softness clashing with sudden forgotten bitterness.