August 2008


"You are no daughter of mine!" I rolled my eyes as my mother stood before me, shrieking. Dad, Joseph, my other brother Elijah and my sister Arianne stood behind her, their wide eyes all on my stomach, I was around five months pregnant now so it's pretty visible, I've been trying my hardest to hide it but then I realised that I really didn't care what my mother thought about me. This baby is Jack's, it's all I have left of the love of my life, the closest I'll ever be to him again.

"When did this happen, Jordan?" My fathers voice was low and thick with on coming tears, I could tell he was more upset than angry, ashamed maybe? That hurt more than anything mother could ever say. My father was ashamed of me, disappointed in me.

Sighing, I looked up so my amber eyes met my fathers hazel ones, tears welled in my eyes but I tried as hard as I could not to let them fall. After a quick glance around the room, I spoke, answering my fathers question in a whisper, "Five months, daddy,"

"Five months?" Mother exploded. "Jordan, this is not acceptable," she seethed, turning her nose up at me. That's one thing I didn't understand about my parents marriage. My father was so kind, caring, laid back and genuine whereas mommy dearest was a cold, heartless, stuck up, back stabbing bitch! I always put it down to opposites attract but that really didn't make it less confusing.

"Julianne, at least give her a chance to speak," dad finally spoke up, trying to reason with her. I scoffed. Nice try! Mother crossed her arms over her chest and huffed, turning away from my father like a spoiled child denied it's favourite toy. "Jules, please. This isn't just anyone, this is our baby girl," my dad smiled. "Our little Jodie bug" I smiled gratefully at my father as he directed a warm smile back at me.

"Don't you get it, Gavin? She isn't our baby anymore, she's a nineteen year old whore with a baby inside her, God only knows who the father is," mother waved her arms around frantically as she yelled at my poor father who simply sighed and shot me an apologetic look.

"I am not a whore!" I exclaimed. "This baby belongs to the only man I have ever loved. It's Jack's," I yelled. "Remember him? Jack? Y'know that guy I'm in love with that you seem to have forgotten about, the guy who's funeral you wouldn't even let me go to! The one man who will forever mean the world to me, he's only been gone three months and I'm still hurting more than anything, but you don't really give a fuck do you? No! Do you bother to ask how I'm feeling? No! And now, here I am pregnant with his baby and all I can think about is how this little boy or girl will never know their father!" Arianne rushed to my side as I fell to my knees, sobbing. Mother's face paled at the mention of Jack but I guess that's because she always hated him.

It was a mystery to me how anyone could ever hate Jack but I knew why mother didn't approve of him. He was normal. He came from a broken home, he wasn't born into money and he didn't see himself as better than everyone else. Jack wasn't a member of a secret society or a country club, hell the closest he ever got to that was when he and Alex fucked around on a golf course and even then they would score each other in happy and sad faces!

"Elijah, go and pack Jordan's things," mother spoke sharply to my thirteen year old brother, snapping her fingers in his direction as you would a puppy. I knew he would do as he was told, he never could deal with mothers yelling. Eli shot me an apologetic look before dashing up the stairs toward my bedroom.

"Julianne," dad gasped. "Don't you think you're being a little irrational?" Mother turned to him with a face like thunder. Father's face dropped into a frown and I could see the fear in his eyes. I always loved my daddy, he was the most important man in a little girls life, but I couldn't stand how spineless he was when it came to my mother, he must love her more than I thought because he let her treat him like a fucking door mat!

"Irrational?" Mother bellowed! "She's just a child, Gavin and she's pregnant, don't you realise the shame she'll bring to the family? Do you not realise what this will do to our name?" Joseph stepped forward, anger in his eyes.

"Mother," he hissed. "You're the one that's bringing us shame, what kind of mother are you? You're nothing but a selfish, bitter old hag," he yelled, striding over to where Arianne and I stood, our jaws practically on the floor. No one ever dared speak that way to our mother before, especially not golden boy Joseph Dean! She was Julianna Day, no one ever spoke out of line to her but here Joey was, standing up for me.

"Arianne," mother clicked her bony fingers once more, "Join Elijah up stairs and pack Joseph's bags," Ari stood her ground for a second until mother took one step toward her, pointing a wrinkled finger in the fifteen year olds face. "Unless you want to join them on the streets," she sneered. Ari shook her head and mumbled an 'I'm sorry,' to Joey and I before speeding up to Joey's room, her small heels clicking on the immaculate marble of the stairs.

By now my spineless father had left the room and I had lost all respect for him. Mother paced the spotless, wooden floors of our living room, pinching the bridge of her nose as she shook her head at Joseph and I.

"I am a reasonable woman," mother began, only making me laugh sarcastically, she ignored it though and kept her head down, "so I'm going to give you both an alternative option. Joseph, you're my eldest son, my first born and you've achieved so much in your life and you've got so much further to go, so if you simply apologise for what you've done and agree that your sister's actions were bad and foolish you can stay," next she turned to me, "And you, Jordan, there's just one thing I want you to do so that you can stay and regain my respect," before she even said it I knew what it would be, I knew what she wanted to do but even though I knew it still came as a shock to me when that one dreaded word left her mouth.