✓ fatal || yang jungwon

015

That's why he had no idea what I was talking about when I first texted him. Telling him that I wanted to kill myself. Asking him to give me a reason to reconsider things.

My heart dropped, as I tightened my grip around my phone.

I had spammed a non-professional person about my past and trauma, not once considering how he might have felt. What if I traumatized him? Burdened him?
Scared him?
He was young.
As young as I was.
He was a person, happily living his life.
Before I came and disrupted everything.

Remembering the articles, it all hit me at once.

The reason why he was so busy, was because unlike me he had a life outside our chat.
With all the schedules he had to attend as an idol, he only had time for me during the night.

And that's why he was always tired during all of his interviews.

Because we were texting all night long.

He received backlash and was constantly tired.

All because of me.

Guilt was written all over my face, causing my heart to clench. It was hard for me to breath.

After looking him up, there were so many information about him that I actually planned to ask him some day.
Things like what his hobbies were. His birthday.
His blood-type. His favorite color. His favorite season.

Now I didn't need to ask him anymore.
It's all here! Spread on the whole internet.

"I really thought that...we could be friends. How could you keep such an important fact from me...?" Tears, tears, tears. I didn't understand. Why did he lie, saying that he was working for the suicide hotline?

The feeling of betrayal and the guilt was eating me up, my stomach was turning, making me feel even more sick.

Opening our chat, I tried to calm my breathing.
I didn't even read his messages.

"This is for the best." I shut my eyes close and threw my phone in the corner, letting myself fall onto the rough ground.

I was too tired to think. To move.

To live.

ji's p.o.v end

"Good work, everyone!" Jungwon happily grabbed himself a water bottle, smiling at his fellow members when the music came to an halt again.

"Are you okay?" Heeseung quickly approached him.

"What do you mean?"

"The articles."

"Ah, right." His smile dropped, "It's fine. It's not like they are wrong. My mind was somewhere else that day..."

"But are you really okay?"

"I am. Thank you for asking." The younger smiled again, patting the other's shoulder, "I'm going to have a talk with our manager later to clear things up for once and all."

That's when Jungwon glanced at his phone, pouting when the girl hadn't answered him yet.

"What's wrong?" Ni-ki sat down next to him, sweat dripping down his forehead.

"She's not answering." Jungwon tilted his head, "She hasn't been answering all day."

"Who?"

"There's only one." Jungwon rolled his eyes playfully, when he shrugged and wrote another message.

That's when his face fell.
"Why are my messages not being delivered?" There was a hint of panic in his voice as Jungwon continued to write more messages.

"Relax...Just try to ring her up." Ni-ki advised and nodded, when the older took his advice.

With hopeful eyes, he waited for her voice to answer.

To no avail.
"Voicemail." Jungwon swallowed, feeling a wave of fear wash over him.

Ni-ki was just as confused, trying to reassure the other, "She must be busy-"

"Tell me..How do you know if someone is blocked...?" Jungwon's voice was quiet, a little too nonchalant.
He was already fearing the worst.

"Do you real-"

"I think she blocked me." The boy's hand with his phone dropped, shock written across his face,

"Ji..blocked me."

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(a/n: i'm not sure if this book should be a short story or a long one😞 seriously i've never written a book this spontaneously💀 let's see in what kind of mood I am in later on)

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'·. please vote and comment if you enjoyed reading this chapter<3 ★°*ﾟ