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I may or may not just have spent 3 hours watching YouTube videos... it might have happened.

I was supposed to watch one video and then it turned in to a lot more and here I am 3 hours later questioning my life. What am I doing? I was supposed to make a video today but I ended up watching YouTube videos for 3 hours instead.

I am not doing a Q and A today because it feels like I do those way to often and that I need to do something more original... let's face it I won't be original. I will just do something different because why not.

I leave my bed and put on a pair of grey sweatpants together with a white shirt. I don't care that I am doing a video today, my viewers are like my family so I won't mind them seeing me in my homey clothes.

I walk out in the kitchen and look through all the things I have and all the things I don't have. I know it probably would be more fun if I did a baking video together with someone, but Niall left yesterday and I do not feel like actually hanging out with someone today I kind of just want to be alone. I wouldn't mind doing this with Harry but he doesn't come home until tomorrow night so I am left to do this on my own.

I smile when I realize that I have everything to make cupcakes. Now all I need to do is put up the camera stuff.

This will be interesting because I am not the best at baking, but come on how hard can it be?

"Hello Internet!!!" I start and waves to the camera with a smile on my lips. I hope they will like this video.

"So today I am going to do a different kind of video, I am going to make cupcakes!" I say and move the camera so they can see all the ingredients I have put on the table. I try to do this like a pro... but I honestly have no idea what I am doing so I am probably failing at doing it right.

"I have only made cupcakes with my sisters before, so this is a first... so let's see how this end up going" I laugh out.

I am careful with everything I am doing and I can imagine how everyone is laughing at how perfect I need it to be.

I am really proud over myself when I put the cupcakes in to the oven because it feels like I actually did something right... even if I probably didn't.

I put my camera off while waiting for the cupcakes to get ready... When my timer goes off I put the camera back on and take them out. I am really surprised how good this actually went.

"Look how pretty they are!!! I am so proud over myself! I can't wait until I can show Harry those." I say without even thinking about it, and when I realize what I said I just blush and make a note to send a picture of them when I am done with them.

I start making the frosting and then I just wait for the cupcakes to get a little bit colder so I actually can hold in them because right now they are so hot that I almost burn myself... burn fingers burn.

When they finally is enough cold I start decorating them and I giggle when things doesn't go as planned because let's face it, things doesn't go as planned.

"TADA!!!!" I say in a happy voice when they are done... they aren't that pretty but I feel really proud over them.

"If you want me to do more videos like this then just leave a comment below and yeah I will see you in the next video... and probably on twitter too because I am there like all the time." I say and giggle. I didn't tell them to like my video because I don't care if they like it or not, because let's face it those people know what they are going to do.

I take up my phone after I put the camera off. I take a picture of the cupcakes and send it to Harry saying that he is missing out on some beautiful cupcakes... sure they aren't that pretty but you know.... THEY ARE MINE!!

After I have done that I take one of them and test it and to my surprise they actually taste really good. Maybe I should give up my YouTube channel and just start a bakery instead... sure we will only sell cupcakes... that isn't that pretty but I am sure that it will work out fine.

From Harry: Those cupcakes look amazing! You better save one for me tomorrow baby xx

I giggle at Harry's text, Harry is one of those people you just feel like you can be yourself with and they won't judge you. I like Harry for that... I like Harry a lot... probably way too much but I honestly couldn't care less.

I can't wait until tomorrow when he gets back, because I have missed him so much that it hurts. It hurts being away for Harry.

I know I shouldn't feel that way but I do and I miss him so much all the time.

I start editing my video instead of mopping around missing Harry, because I felt like that is something that I actually can do.


I was supposed to update earlier but I kind of watched youtube videos for 3 hours... oops

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