willing

eighteen

the next day

I held Luke's hand gently as we watched Lily run around the backyard, Michael chasing her as in circles.

"So i have a question" luke spoke slowly.

"Hm?" I hummed out, seeing him grin.

"So say that metaphorically- i wanted to take you on a nice date and that metaphorically the guys agreed to watch Lily the night of this date- would you metaphorically say yes to the date?"

I instantly laughed

"Thats a lot of metaphoricals." I laughed.

he smiled shyly, looking to me.

"So say it wasnt metaphorical and i had it planned for tomorrow." He laughed out.

"Well then." I smiled, himself bringing his forehead to touch mine gently.

"Then i'd say yes."

Luke.

"Then i'd say yes." She spoke happily, making me smile even wider.

Kiss her.

I was already so close, just do it.

But what if it scares her?

I saw her eyes dart to my lips before right back to my eyes. 

I pushed away the want to kiss her and i gently kissed her forehead before putting an arm around her, feeling her scoot a little closer to me as i did.

"Mommy look!" Lily screamed as Michael picked her up, running with her for a few feet.

the next day.
Tate.

"Mommy i want make up" lily spoke as she watched me put make up on, preparing for mh date with Luke.

"You dont need make up" i smiled to her, kissing her lightly.

"Yes i do" i instantly heard her whining.

"Its not good for your skin" i told her, seeinf her cross her arms- knowing this wasnt going to end well.

"Well you have it on your skin-" "i can have it on my skin because im big, when you get big enough ill give you make up." I told her calmly.

"Can i have this at least?" She asked, holding a brush that i had used to put on highlight.

"Sure baby"

I then stood in a pair of biker shorts and a sports bra, digging through my outfit options as i held Lily, not knowing which to pick.

"My girls" i heard Luke sing as he came in.

And as comfortable as i was with Luke- i almost still wanted to hide my body from him.

"Hi" i exhaled as he touched Lily's side gently, acting like he was going to tickle her.

"Luke" she laughed out before immediately reaching to him, making him take her from my arms, kissing the side of my head gently as he did.

I crossed my arms over my body as i exhaled from frustration, not knowing what i wanted to wear.

"Whats wrong?" He asked.

"I cant pick an oufit." I told him slowly.

"The white" he picked for me, making me grab it, holding it in front of my body as i finally faced him, making immediate eye contact with him.

"Whats wrong?" He asked again.

"Nothing" i immediately told him.

"You're hiding yourself from me" he pointed out, letting Lily's squirming body down, hearing her yell for Calum, who i could hear talking down the hall.

"I just- i dont-" "i can leave, if you arent comfortable, you just have to tell me-" "no." I spoke firmly.

"Im just bloated and dont want you-" "you are absolutely beautiful." He immediately told me.

I hadnt been told that in so long.

I swallowed lightly, feeling him grab my hands gently.

"I will never ever think that you arent drop dead gorgeous, i promise."

And with that, i took the initiate that i had been contemplating doing for the past few days

I stepped forward, sealing the space between us, touching my lips to his as gently as i could