Y/N and the Avengers

You're a soldier

"Y/N!", you heard far away but couldn't really see what was going on. "Y/N, stop!" "Be a good girl and kill him", a man's voice said. "Copied", you heard yourself saying. "Y/n don't. It's me. Clint. Don't you remember me?" 'Clint...?' "You sound like it would make a difference", you said laughingly. "Y/n, you're not yourself. We will work this out, just... don't do anything wrong now, okay?" You began to see some colours but everything was blurry.
You heard grunting noises and felt a sudden pain in your arm. "Give up, Barton. This is nothing", you said. "I'm not even trying", he replied. You heard someone crying but didn't know where it came from.
"Y/n! No!", Clint yelled and something strangled you. You heard a thud and a grunt, then the crying got louder. "It's okay, y/n, I know it's not you. Don't be harsh on yourself later", Natasha said and tried to sound tough. But she wasn't. You could hear how broken she was.
The vision got clearer and you found yourself holding a knife at Natasha's throat. Immediately you dropped it and stepped back. "Oh, god... oh, god... oh, god... I'm... I..."
You saw a little cut on her throat, blood coming out of it and a big blood spot on her belly that seemed to get bigger.
"EQ8, finish already. We don't have much time!" "They're dead, boss, but more people are on their way", you lied. "Good girl. Act like one of us did that and you tried to help but came too late." "Copied." "Our team is gone any moment. Just stay there." "Understood."

When you saw that the last person had left the tower you slumped down crying, noticing all the blood on your hands and clothes.
"What... what happened here?!", Stark asked from behind, "Are you okay, y/n?" He came closer but when he saw all the blood on you he stepped back. "You...", he stopped and looked over to Natasha and Clint. You didn't move an inch nor did you say anything.
"Y/n, what happened?", he asked cautiously, "Was it... you?" A tear rushed down your cheek. "What have you done...", Tony said horrified. "Mister Stark it looks like-", the boy's voice stopped. "Don't come closer kiddo. Get help. Maybe even code green", Tony commanded. "I can just", the boy said and suddenly you felt tied up. It was triggering you but the shock was still too big so even with your panic you didn't do anything. "Parker! I said don't and you do it anyway? Is it puberty? Get! Help!"

A few minutes later you heard Bruce's voice behind you. "Y/n", he began and waited a second, "are you y/n?" You didn't react. "Are the webs triggering you?", he asked and you barely nodded. "I'm going to come closer slowly and will cut them for you, okay?" A tear ran down your cheek and he took it as a yes.
He did as he said but you didn't change your position, still looking at your hands in horror. More tears were rushing down now.
"If you attack us, I won't be easy on you, so better don't do anything."
He was only a few steps away from you and you knew that he was just this close because he couldn't get killed. Meanwhile Peter and Tony were each carrying a body inside.

"We're alone now", Bruce said, "you can't hurt anyone here."
He waited for you to do anything but you didn't. "Y/n, please say something." You looked up for the first time now and he tried to smile at you but it looked like a weird grimace.
"It's safe here", he added and you scoffed. "You are y/n, right?" You scoffed again and laughed, shaking your head. "You think it's safe here?", you asked and stood up. You felt Bruce tensing up and walked closer to him. "You really think you're safe?", you hissed and grabbed the knife from the floor. "You know that the other guy will interfere." "Will he? Where was he when you almost died? Where I almost killed you?" "Put it away", Bruce warned. "See, you don't believe it yourself. You don't think he will keep you safe." Bruce sighed and looked down.
"I was right", you said and came as close as physically possible. "If you'd be right you wouldn't have gotten that close", he said and you took a step back to look at his whole body. No green.
"What if I...", you said and pressed the tip of the knife slightly against his chest. But he didn't move. "Why aren't you more scared?" "Because you won't hurt me, y/n. Put that away." "Y/n, y/n, y/n,...", you said mockingly and he looked at you skeptically.
Suddenly he punched the knife out of your hand and gave you a strong hug that you couldn't get out of. "I would have never hurt you, y/n. Nor would I have let you hurt yourself. No matter what you would've said", he whispered and you began to cry heavily. "Just... just kill me..." "No... you're one of us. Everything's going to be okay." "I don't deserve being alive... Hydra-" "Don't. Y/n, stop." "Hydra wants-" "Y/N! If you do that we can't be there for you anymore." "They were..." Your body felt so weak suddenly and your legs didn't hold you anymore. "Finally... that took way too long to work...", Bruce said and picked you up.