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Chapter 34

"Flying is actually the safest mode of transportation, the second safest is dreaming, the third safest is decomposing into rich earth and drifting away with the wind and rain.

Welcome to Night Vale," you hear Cecil's voice come onto the air and you turn up your radios.

"Hello listeners, today I have a special treat. Do you all remember the Rebellious Stranger from a few days before? Well he is back and sitting with me in my studio today."

"Thanks for having me Cecil," you hear Percy's voice come into your radio.

"No problem Rebellious Stranger," Cecil says.

"Can you just call me Percy?" Percy asks.

"No I cannot," Cecil says and then continues, "Now Stranger," Percy gives an exasperated sigh into his microphone, "we all know about your staying with Old Woman Josie and the angels that don't exist. Would you like to tell our listeners about that?"

"Um . . . I don't know . . . I go into the house every night and . . . I legitimately have no idea what happens inside the house the next morning. I am actually not sure that I even slept in the house . . . although I can't remember it anyway."

"Well that's disappointing," Cecil says.

"Sorry about that," Percy said, "But what is up with this town? Nothing makes sense! Why do you have a dog park where no dogs are allowed and the Hooded Figures are the only ones inside the dog park? All so, while we are on this topic, why the heck would you surround a dog park with huge black walls?"

"Percy, look, I know you are new here, but please don't insult our town. This is completely normal. I mean what do other towns do with dog parks?"

"Let dogs inside-"

"No other town allows dogs inside their parks. Unless that town is Desert Bluffs, that town is horrible."

"What the heck is Dessert Bluffs?"

"Oh it's the nasty town next to us, they are vile and nasty town's people."

"Ummm okay? This place is really creeping me out."

"Oh yes, that is a perk of this fine town."



"Why are Wheat and its byproducts out lawed here?"

"There was a worldwide change through the Wheat and their byproducts that made them turn into venomous snakes and so we had to get rid of them."

"Oh, I must have missed that . . ."

"Probably, but don't worry we can fill you in on all sorts of things," Cecil says.

"Well actually, Cecil, Lorem is telling me that it is almost time for me to go. And I am not at all sad about it."

"Where are you going?" Cecil asks.

"I actually don't know," Percy said.

"Oh, so you are going out back to the Ralf's?" Cecil asks.

"No- you know what, yes, that's where I am going." Percy says.

"Well it has been awesome getting to know you Percy Jackson. I am sorry that no one had any of your stones."

"That's okay, we'll get them," Percy says.

"Tell Lorem goodbye and thanks for the chocolates." Cecil said.

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