Chapter 20-Accepting My Alpha
After an awkward breakfast, Josh and Eileen decided to go out and spend some time together. Eric went home, leaving Blake and I together in an awkward silence.
The others tried to get us to join their conversation, but Blake completely ignored them, and I only gave a few words in response.After a while, they just gave up and as soon as they were done with breakfast, they made their escape.
My mind was too occupied with what had happened before. I know Blake said that he forgave me, but he was being really quiet, and avoiding eye contact with me so I think he is still mad.
I saw a completely different side of him that I wasn't use to. I've never seen him so vulnerable, it was very shocking. I have to remember he has feelings too and he gets insecure just like everyone else.
"Alright, why do you keep looking at me like that?" Blake asks with an exasperated sigh. I bite my bottom lip and tear my eyes away from his. I didn't realize that I was still staring at him, having been lost in thought.
"I'm sorry," I whisper. I'm apologizing for more than just looking at him and he knows that. I still feel bad for what I said earlier.
Blake lets out another frustrated sigh as he pushes his messy hair from his face. He's quiet for a few moments and he continues to avoid eye contact with me. Since we're still sitting at the table and we're right across from each other, it's even more awkward.
He suddenly pushes his chair back before standing up abruptly. The chair skids back and almost falls over, but he catches it just in time.
"You don't have to keep apologizing. I know you didn't mean it. I told you I was fine," he says, taking a few steps around the table and then a few towards me.
"I know, I still feel bad though," I admit, remembering the sad look on his face. He takes a few more steps until he's in front of me.
"You shouldn't feel bad. I was just feeling a little sensitive this morning," he answers while cupping my right cheek with his left hand.
I bring my eyes up to his, and I don't see a hint of anger in them.
"You just seemed really upset at breakfast," I mumble, leaning into his hand.
"I was talking to Tobias. Sorry I spaced out for a while. We talked, and everything's ok now." I nod my head as I see the sincere look on his face.
"Do you want to watch TV?" I ask, changing the subject. I drag him behind me without waiting for his response.
I sit down on one side of the couch before stretching my legs out. Blake sits on the other side after lifting up my legs and then placing them on his lap.
I turn the TV onto Spongebob, happy to have something mindless to watch.
I sit there staring at the screen, barely watching the screen, mostly consumed by my thoughts.
I'm glad that everything from this morning calmed down and we are able to just relax in each others company. I've never felt so calm or happy around anyone. Just thinking about the small moments we've had together makes butterflies erupt in my stomach.
As I think back to these last few weeks, a question that has been in the back of my mind resurfaces.
"Blake, when am I going to meet the pack?" His eyes immediately lock onto mine before the go back to the TV. He grabs the remote and turns down the volume all the way before facing me.
"You can meet them whenever you want to. I know all of this has been a lot to take in, so I didn't want to overwhelm you."
"I want to meet them soon. If I'm supposed to be your equal and help you run the pack, I would like to get to know them sooner rather than later," I say while rubbing my chin. Blake gives me a reassuring nod.
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*this book has been on a super long hiatus for forever and i'm not sure when it will be finished. i do want to finish this story but i'm not sure when i'll be able to since life is crazy. i just wanted to post this warning since i've seen some comme...