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i. COVER & TITLE
While I like the colour scheme and theme of your cover, I do find it a little crowded and maybe a bit much to look at. The author's name is pretty difficult to read because it's small, and the title is difficult to read because of the font/darkness. I think there's potential in this cover, but I do believe these issues need to be cleared up before it really draws my attention.
I can't say I like the title. That's because I don't know what it means, and I still don't know what it means after I read the blurb. I do think you can have titles that aren't yet completely related to the story, but I do think it's important that readers at least feel some connection before they start the book.
ii. BLURB
Your blurb lacks an aspect of snappiness. That's for a few reasons: The double hook, the first and last names, and the many tiny paragraphs. The more paragraphs you have, the more likely the reader is going to skip one. It's better to have some, but not tons. The only other problem I have with the blurb is how generalized it seems to be. It's all about manipulation, power, and seemingly some posturing, but I don't actually know any of the events or things that are going to happen. Is there going to be an adventure? A big fight? Someone falling in love? That stuff might be world mentioning. I think it would make your blurb even better than it is.
0 9 / 1 5
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i. PUNCTUATION
#1: DASHES
Three types of dashes. One, the hyphen (-). The hyphen is for hyphenated words, shockingly. Words like five-foot-ten or mother-in-law.
Two, the en dash (–). The en dash is just sort of there. It's not used in creative writing unless it's some sort of range, like 80 – 90 degrees, which you probably wouldn't come across if you're writing your story professionally.
