That time I seriously thought that Liam was going to drag me back to the dining room and I was ready to smash my plate with food into his head, but he never came, no one ever came checking on me, it was just like they didn’t care which was perfectly good for me as I spent most of my time on bed, with my eyes closed just thinking.
I didn’t feel angry anymore
I didn’t feel sad or anxious
Or hungry
Or lonely
I just didn’t feel….
Anything
I knew I should be scared of my numbness; I should be trying to escape or at least freaking out like the first couple days but what could I really do? Even if I managed to escape I didn’t have money or a place to stay and going to the police wasn’t really an option because they wouldn’t believe me… and I was in Europe, so my only option left was to stop caring.
It was way easier
Harrys POV
“Full again?” Liam asked when I came back from my way upstairs, I looked at the plate with toast and cereal that Niall had left it outside Alex’s door just a couple hours before, I sadly nodded with my head, there wasn’t much that we could do except shoving the food down her throat witch Zayn said wasn’t an option.
“Giving her time it’s not working, its being almost a week!” Liam said taking the food from the plate and throwing it into the container; I looked to Zayn who looked to Louis.
“Why is everyone looking at me?”Louis asked frowning
“Boo, did you apologize to her?” I asked
“Why should I do it?!” He snapped, the lads gasped, Louis never talked to me like that but the truth is that he hasn’t been himself for a while
“What? You all know what I did it!”
“Actually no, we don’t” Niall snapped, Niall is a care free kind of guy but when he is mad he can have the temperament of a… well Irish.
“I don’t have to explain anything to you guys” Louis said turning around, I did know why he said what he said, I could tell the lads, make them go easier on him but as much as I love Lou he could really act like an ass and this time he had to learn his lesson the hard way.
Louis’ Pov
“There’s no one who will care if you go missing” I had say
“No one it’s looking for you” I had lie
“You found pleasure in hurting me don’t you?” She was so wrong…
“I’m sorry” I had say, the only truth in a speech made out of lies
“I don’t believe you” And that was the only one she choose to not believe
I crawled in a corner flinching at the memory of the look in her eyes; she had believed all of that crap, why are you so feeling so guilty now? That’s what you wanted, wasn’t it? To make her feel like no one cared, to stop her from wanting to leave.
How is that working for you now? The voice in my head mocked.
No, that’s not what I wanted
Ohh, really?
Maybe that was my purpose… but I didn’t think she would break like this
What were you thinking? That she would turn to you for comfort? Please!
I even try to convince myself that we were doing her a favor that she was going to feel happy after, Gosh I was so stupid, I needed to apologize, I couldn’t tell her the truth but I could apologize…
I went upstairs to her room, I knocked on the door waiting for her to open, we didn’t bother to lock her door anymore it wasn’t like she would go out.
“Alex?” I said without opening the door, no sounding was coming from her room and I was starting to worry “I’m going to come in” I announced opening the door, she was in the bed at first I thought she was sleeping but her breaths were too irregular for that… unless she was having a nightmare
“N-no” She mumbled and I knew she was sleeping otherwise she wouldn’t talk to me, I stand by her side not sure of what to do, would she freak out if I touched her? She frowned and kicked in her sleep “Noo!” She said louder this time.
“Alex, wake up” When talking didn’t work I stroke her cheek, but she didn’t wake up
“Babe, you need to wake up” I said shaking her arm, her eyes open and widened when she saw me
“You were having a nightmare” I touched the bed waiting for her to react when she didn’t I sat by her side, still no reaction.
“Silent treatment, ehh? You can choose to ignore me but unless you cover your ears you’ll have to hear me” The Alex I knew would stick her tongue at me and probably scream that she couldn’t hear me over the sound of her awesomess, then I would reply that awesomess wasn’t a word which she would pretend to not hear, but this Alex wouldn’t do any of that, she just blinked looking pass me.
“What I said was pretty hard and I know that and apology won’t make you feel better” I said staring at her waiting for any signal that she was listening to me, she looked so.. empty and we did that, it wasn’t only what I said like the lads liked to pretend, sure I said something I shouldn’t but I wasn’t the only one keeping her captivate
“The boys and I we-we tried our best it’s not enough but I-I’m really sorry”
Alex POV
Louis broke in tears
“I-I’m really sorry “ He had say between sobs, I watched him as he hugged himself in an attempt to calm down.
“I know it wouldn’t make you feel better” you’re right it doesn’t
“we tried our best” it’s not enough
“ I’m really sorry, I’m really sorry, I’m sorry… sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry SORRY” The words echoed in my head, he felt bad right? then why wasn’t I feeling better?
Because you care
No I don’t
Then why are you crying?
Am I?
Suddenly warm fingers were cleaning up my wet cheeks, I looked at Louis’ sad eyes, I wanted to say that I forgave him but I couldn’t, I didn’t feel it, so I just nodded
He smile at me and I hated him a little, I hated him for making me care when it hurts so much, I hated him because he brought me back from my numbness he brought me back to my reality and waking up to find out that your situation is worse than your nightmare isn’t pretty
He closed the door
And I broke back in tears
*********
Holly crap the story now has 38 000 views!! And last chapter had 27 votes! That’s the most votes in a chapter I had ever have! *jumps in happiness* like I’m not even kidding when I saw the number I was pretty happy.
I’ll try my best to update but my life is pretty messed up right now “too much muchiness” like Lou would say, I hope you like this chapter even thought its kinda depressive
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