Everyday, she would walk from that place of hell. She would walk away humiliated, alone. One day, she broke. The already broken girl broke further. How, you ask? She was pushed to her absolute boundaries. Almost the same way a person is an inch away from the edge of a cliff, wondering whether to jump, when they are shoved. The day she snapped was close to the end of the year. It proved that everything she had worked towards, every little tiny thing, was for nothing. Her single, one goal had been snatched away by someone she detested beyond words. It made her realise that she was indeed worthless, dense, witless, unhumorous, which combined, in her mind, created the personality of a person nobody wished to befriend or be around. The girl was beyond angered; she was absolutely furious. At herself, because she wasn't good enough to achieve what she desired to. Despite putting everything she had into what she had done, she wasn't good enough. Yet all these people were telling her she was intelligent, beautiful, witty. She knew the truth, she knew she wasn't. The anger she felt towards herself built and built until she snapped. In a fury, she blindly took everything out on herself. Later, realising what she had done, she attempted to erase the evidence but found that she couldn't. After it had faded she continued her life as normal, until another flurry of anger came, shortly after New Year's. She had sworn to herself she would never again do what she had done before, but the second time she couldn't help herself. She did this once more before the new term began in February. The girl had intended to start the term in a good note. She did not want a repeat of last year. Little did she know it would be even worse. Things were fine at first, until she couldn't do a simple math problem. It was the start of a string of bad events; falling into the habit of taking everything out on herself, fighting with parents, fighting with friends and eventually depending on one person to help her pick herself up. Yet during the time all this was happening, nobody cared. She screamed so loud, but nobody heard a thing, and if they did, they ignored her screams and turned away. Her grades were failing, her concentration was down to nothing. People still called her intelligent and beautiful, people told her there was nothing wrong with her. She believed her attitude to life spoke otherwise. But she was afraid to speak out about her emotions, because she knew she would just be sent back to the place she feared most.
'She has so much more to offer than she's giving.'
'She's intelligent, have you seen the marks she's pulling?'
That's what they said. However they never stopped to consider that she was giving everything she had in her obliterated state. Perhaps there was too much running through her already exploded mind for her to obtain the information she needed to pass her subjects.
Failing assessment after assessment lowered her esteem further still, and soon there was none left. Luckily for her, she would be leaving for a short period of time. She knew there was no possibility she was going to get anything when she returned. No grades. She would not be able to concentrate. The sleepless nights would return, the flurries of anger would be more frequent. She often wondered why on earth she chose to stay, when she could so easily have left, forever.
Everyday she wonders;
'What if I stopped caring? What if I lived the way I wanted to? What if I just quit?'
The world saw this depressed, broken, anxious, scared girl as someone else. They saw her as a smart, pretty, level-headed, logical, joyful, quiet and carefree. When in fact, when this girl is acting as the world wishes her to, her inner self is screaming, panicking, attempting to break out. Wherever she is, she is inches away from breaking down, letting out all the emotions she has been holding in for almost three years. She is trapped inside herself.
The irony of this situation is that the entire world thinks they know this girl so well. The irony is, the girl they believe they know so well? She doesn't exist.
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There Was Once A Girl Known By Everyone and No OneShort Story
Just a short story about a girl known by everyone and no one. NOTE: This is not a Taylor Swift fanfiction, despite Tay being on the cover.