When Agnetha woke up the next morning, they were still in each others arms, their legs entwined together, faces only inches apart.
A wave of affection and love washed over her as she looked into Fridas sleeping face. She looked so peaceful and pure.
And so beautiful. Always so beautiful.
If they could stay like this forever, she'd be content, but glancing at the clock, she realized it wouldn't be long before the alarm went off and they had to get up to play the roles everyone expected them to play. So with a heavy heart, she began gently stroking Frida's back to wake her up.
Frida stirred and gave her her prettiest sleepy smile, eyes still closed, before snuggling closer and pulling her tight, mumbling
"Good morning love."
Just by her breathing, Frida could hear that she was smiling. But then there was uncertainty and a hint of disappointment in her voice as she rushed to clarify.
"Frida it's me."
That little sentence tugged at all of her heartstrings.
She was so adorable to think she wouldn't recognize her. That she wouldn't mean her.
"Oh really? You feel exactly like Benny."
To punctuate her words, Frida brushed her leg against hers and tenderly ran her hand down her waist.
"No difference."
They both chuckled and Agnetha snorted in indignation, pulled her into her arms and started tickling her in revenge for the comparison.
Frida's giggle had to be the most precious sound she had ever heard. Halfheartedly she tried to escape her tickling. But she wouldn't let her go. She would never let her go.
She stopped teasing and just held her tight. Frida relaxed against her and sighed contentedly and they took a moment to savor this feeling of absolute peace and contentment.
Then without even thinking about what she was doing, her hands began to roam over her back, slowly and lovingly but with an underlying passion in the way she was touching her.
When she reached the nape of her neck and touched the bare skin there, she could feel Frida shiver. As she buried her hand into her hair, she suddenly looked up and deep into her eyes. She cupped her cheek and affectionately caressed it with her fingertips. Then her face grew serious, with a look she had never seen before. Her eyes flickered to her lips and back up, seeming to look right into her soul.
At that moment, Agnetha would have given up everything for her. She had never wanted to kiss someone as badly as she wanted to kiss her.
But a loud knock on the door burst their bubble. Frida flinched and turned her head.
"Good morning! Can i come in?"
Called Bennys voice from outside the door.
"One moment."
She stroked her face one last time with a wistful look in her eyes and kissed her forehead before getting out of bed.
They nodded to each other, communicating with their eyes, both recovering from what they almost did.
"Come in."
‐----‐-------------------------‐--------------------‐--------------------‐--------------
While getting ready for the day, Frida was lost in thought about Agnetha.
As she had met her, Agnetha had been little more than a child. Frida had told herself back then that she would never fall for her girlish charm like the rest of the world did.
It now felt like a lifetime ago. How Agnetha had matured over the years. How she grew to love the woman behind that beautiful face.
Yes, love her she did. There was no doubt about it.
But she was still the older one and therefore felt a certain responsibility. Today she had almost lost control. That must never happen again.
With their deep connection it was necessary to draw a line somewhere. Kissing her had to remain taboo. They both knew that.
----‐--------------------‐--------------------‐------------------
Only in the evening, shortly before the concert started, did they have a moment alone again.
Frida sat in front of the mirror and finished her makeup while Agnetha paced around nervously.
"Are you nervous?"
Agnetha nodded.
"I'll never get rid of that."
"Come here."
Frida reached out and pulled her into her arms, resting her head upon her chest, hearing the accelerated beat of her heart.
"Me too. But like every time, we're going to go out there and show them all. And they will adore you, as always."
Agnetha hugged her tighter and slowly relaxed in her arms. She needed this so badly. Knowing they were okay. After a while she pulled back, took her hand and smiled confidently.
"Let's show them."
And they did.
Catalyzing every suppressed emotion into pure energy on stage, they were pushing each other to their absolute best, feeling that together they were capable of anything and everything.
----‐--------------------‐--------------------‐------------------
Later as she lay in bed, Agnetha finally had time to review the previous night. And the morning. She tried to remember every little detail, every affectionate remark, every touch and the feeling of incredible closeness, both physically and mentally in a way she had never felt with anyone before.
Still deep in thought, she tensed up when Björn wrapped an arm around her and snuggled close.
"Sorry, I know, I'm nothing like Frida."
It was obviously meant to be a joke, but the sheer truth in it was painful.
He began stroking her waist, but although he was gentle, all she could think about was how it felt nothing like her touch.
She couldn't do that now.
But she couldn't reject him either.
He had seen them and might become suspicious if she rejected him now.
As he kissed her neck, she closed her eyes and tried desperately to hold back her thoughts.
How would it feel if it were her lips, her hands, her body pressed tight against hers? How would she move, breathe, throw her head back and...
No, she snapped her eyes wide open and drew in a deep breath.
She mustn't think about her now.
Focus on him and his touches. He was real, he was with her, he loved her. And she loved him. At least that's what she thought until... No, turn those damn thoughts off!
She shouldn't think about her this way. It was pointless. It could never be.
But she couldn't let go as she fought her thoughts. Her body just didn't respond the way it should. Soon he would notice. She wasn't an actress, especially when it came to feelings. But she just couldn't clear her head.
She didn't stand a choice, at least that's how it felt. It was wrong. But no one would ever know.
She closed her eyes and gave in to these thoughts. It were her eyes she saw now in her mind, shining with love and want for her.
It were her hands she imagined as she was touching her own skin through the fabric of her nightgown, mimicking her touch.
And finally her body responded.
As she reached her release that night, eyes closed, mouth open in a silent cry, biting back the name she longed to cry out, her body was satisfied but her soul was not.
