All strings detached - Leon S. Kennedy

The end.

How was I feeling? Happy? Sad? Confused? I look down on my stomach, I always wanted children, so on one side I am happy, on the other I am feeling completely alone in this situation, I am confused and scared. Last time my baby died, I hold onto my stomach as I think these thoughts, it's not my fault but somehow I can't stop thinking that maybe if I was more careful my baby would still be here, maybe Leon would still be with me, didn't have that accident and would still remember me. Tears run down my cheek, this is the only place I'm able to show emotions, I don't feel comfortable doing so in the hospital, I don't want anyone to see me when I show how I truly feel. I put the keys to my apartment into my pockets. Chris is picking me up for work, funny right? I'm going back to work, while Leon is in the hospital. I can't get into a car myself, thinking about what happened to Leon scared me more than I'd like to admit, being in the passangers seat made things a lot more easier. "Hey, ready for work?" Chris asks as I sit down "You bet" I try to force a smile. This is where I tell him, he can't run, he can't yell. "My flight is going later today, I'm not going to see him" I say, watching as his hand grips onto the steering wheel "I need you to give him something" he parks the car in the parking lot, turning to look at me "You know what I think" he states, I nod in return "I know, but I'm miserable, I can't do this any longer" I take out an envelope with a Letter inside, a letter I wrote last night when I couldn't sleep, when I booked my flight, when I decided to leave everything behind and do what I planned to do 3 weeks ago. "What is this?" He asks, taking it out of my hand "Don't open it, please" "I tell him everything in there, what we did, who he is to me and how much I love him" he gives me the eyes again "I even told him about..." I look down on me "I even told him that I'm pregnant" He sighs and puts the envelope into his pockets "I'll give it to him Amber, are you going alone?" "Yes, I think it's for the better" I step out of the car, ending the covnersation.

I sit at my desk, nothing else to think about than today, it was short notice, yes, but it was the right decision. I was going to say Goodbye to Chris one last time, one last time for real. There is no way I'd just let him go like that, he's been my best friend for years. I lay my head on the table, I was ready to work until I leave, I didn't want to slack off but I realize now why Chris told me to just stay home, I'm feeling sick, my head is killing me and I wish something in the world could numb the pain right now. I shake my leg up and down as I read through the files on my table, nothing special, just more organizing ect. God, why did I agree to come here, this feels like my second home, it makes me not want to leave even more. Fidgeting with my fingers as I listen to the people say goodbye in the break room, Chris not being able to force a smile today. I feel horrible for the way I went on about this. It's so empty without Leon here, even though he's not here most of the time, knowing he's not even at stratcom made things feel even weirder, instead he was in a hospital, somewhere he didn't belong. "I can't believe you're going to the headquarters" A guy from our unit says, I smile at him "It's a big step, I wouldn't be here without Redfield" I place my cup down, looking at him across the room. "I was going to ask, how is Leon doing?" Mike asks, I look up at him "I mean, he's doing good" I leave the part out where he remembers everything but me. Or at least I wanted to leave that out "How are you two? With you leaving" Mike catches up, of course he'd want to know, after all he helped me that night at Chris birthday. I stammer, not being able to find the right words, nervously I laugh "He doesn't remember me, so it doesn't matter" I put my hands into my pockets, I didn't know what to do with them right now, I didn't want to seem vulnerable "Oh, wow" Mike huffs, hand ony my upper arm "I'm sure he'll remember" he tries to give me nice words "Thanks Mike, don't think it matters anymore after today" I smile slightly as I look at the clock, getting ready to sit back down and work. 

"Is this it?" Chris says as I put my suitcase out of his car, I was here 4 hours early, I couldn't stand being in my empty apartment anymore, couldn't bear seeing this city, couldn't bear the memories that came flooding in on each corner of the streets. The bar Leon brought me home from, 2 and a half years ago, the street I tripped on drunk, him catching me by my arm everytime. The apartment in which we shared too many memories, the supermarket I'd catch him and ada close to. "I think so" I look at him, I didn't know how to say goodbye, I never had to, not like this. "Come here" he says, his arms out. I laugh as I give him a big hug "Thank you for everything Chris" I bury my head in his chest, of course I'd cry, that's just how I am. "You still work for the BSAA, no one says you'll get rid of me like that" he says, one hand on the back of my head, the other arm holding me tight. I've never had a friend like Chris, always having my back even when he's friends with Leon, he'd always find a way to have time for me, cheer me up and give me the upmost respect at the same time. I look up to him "I wouldn't want to get rid of you, ever" I try to distance myself but he hugs me even tighter "Chris" I smile, soft voice "Sorry" He lets go of me "Talk to me, keep me uptodate" he pokes my stomach softly, does he really think I wouldn't call him for everything? "Of course" I look around me, bag over my shoulder "Make sure to give him the letter" I wipe my tears away "And you're sure you don't want to tell him yourself? There's still time, if we hurry-" he rambles but I interrupt him "I wouldn't be able to say it, I'd be a stammering, mumbling and crying mess, trying to tell a man with no memory of me that I'm pregnant, that he loved me. I'd rather embarass myself on paper" I take my suitcase "I'll see you around Chris" I say "See you around" he quietly says before I turn around and walk through the doors of the airport. 

P.o.V Leon S. Kennedy