Belonging | Alec Lightwood

(55) Shattering

He looks at me, so deep it's as if he can see into my soul.

"Sounds like a good idea to me" He whispers against my ear, pulling back with a knowing grin.

"Goodnight, guys" I mutter out, ignoring their suggestive giggles as Alec smiles and we walk out of the Ops Centre. Alec intertwines our fingers into a hold, the both of us walking in sync.

The institute was silent and most corridors pitch black as Shadowhunter's slept in their room, resting before the long day ahead. In silence, Alec and I made our way through the endless corridors, turning left and right and up a few steps before stopping in front of a large mahogany door.

It was identical to all the others.

But I knew it was Alec's.

I bite my cheek nervously as Alec unlocks his door, pushing it open. He steps inside, taking a few steps in before turning his attention back to me. I stand still, not moving and barely breathing, looking at the threshold.

Alec's eyes are soft, understanding, and I feel my chest lighten knowing he had no expectations and there was no pressure.

I step in.

I feel Alec exhale lightly as I walk past him, relieved. My eyes scan the room, taking in all the things around.

I look from the circular brown wood table, books and papers stacked on top before shifting to the honey brown sofa and matching chairs to the left of the room near the windows. My feet wander and my eyes look aimlessly, brushing from the large mahogany wardrobe that was completely shut to the small polaroid's pinned to the side of the chest of draws.

From this distance, my eyes can make out Izzy, Jace and Max.

Family photos.

I can't help but smile, comforted by the fact that Alec's room wasn't as lifeless and dreary as I feared it would be.

"I've never seen your room before," I say softly, my eyes shifting back to Alec, who was now leaning against his table, his arms folded and his eyes fondly on mine. I smile, doing a dramatic 360 turn, laughing childishly.

"It's nice... I know most of the rooms are the same, but this feels like you" I say, gnawing on my lip.

"Guess this means you have to show me your room" He smirks, coming up off the table and standing up straight.

"Oh, you have to earn the right to see my room, Lightwood" I tease, making Alec chuckle in reply.

We stand staring at each other for a few minutes, the silence palpable.

"Alec-"

"We should go to bed"

We both speak at the same time.

I nod surprised, agreeing with him.

"Stay the night?" He asks hopefully, his voice a soft whisper, though I still hear him. I pause, mind wracking, overthinking things that I don't need to overthink.

"You don't have to- "

"Give me a t-shirt to change into?" I ask, looking up at him, my hands wringing together behind my back. Alec stops, his brows raised, a nice kind of surprise written across his face. Within a second, he launches forward to his wardrobe, pulling out a black plain t-shirt, one much bigger than my usual size.

I walk over swiftly, my hand coming up, my fingers brushing past his as I grab the top, the material soft under my touch. "I'll change in the bathroom," I say quietly, and after Alec nods once, his body as stiff as a board, I turn and walk away.