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This is dedicated to @vdowell1996. This is actually my very first 1D thing I've ever written. Vanessa is a HUGE Larry fan, and I wrote it for her birthday a few months ago.

It's sad, and she hates me for it. LOVE YOU BABY BOO!!

Enjoy! X


Louis PoV:

Why am I such a fuck up!?

I slammed the door closed, the sound echoing throught the hotel room. My tears were free falling, and all I wanted to do was to forget.

How am I going to face them? How am I going to face him?

3rd Person PoV: Flashback:

Louis was trying, that's for sure.

Rehearsals for the long awaited Take Me Home tour were usually great for him, but today... It was going terribly.

He kept falling during the dance routines, singing off key and completely wrong notes. He even forgot to come in on his solos. The managers reassured him it was fine, as long as he was okay by the concert that night. "It is opening night, you know," one of them chirped.

Great, he thought.

Niall was trying to cheer him up, but the older boy just wasn't having it. "C'mon mate," Niall said, his Irish accent strong. "We all mess up sometimes." He gave Louis his perfected puppy dog look, the one he reserved only for when he wanted something.

Louis couldn't help but smile at his adorable blue eyes. "I'll be fine. Thanks, Ni." He looked over at the boy sitting on the loveseat in his dressing room, playing on his phone. He wanted to run over there and fix his wild mane of curls, and plant a chaste kiss on his soft lips.

Things with Elounor were rough, and Louis was having a tough time keeping his feelings in check.

No one knew, but Louis was gay. Has been, always will be. He loved Eleanor, and he hated lying to her. When he first realized he was gay, it was when all the Larry shipping came about. He realized he did love Harry, except Harry didn't love him like that.

He dated Eleanor because he was in love with her once, but Harry changed that.

When Harry looked over at the two lads, he smirked. "Just try not to mess up at the gig tonight, kay fag?"

To any other person, that would have sounded cruel and plain mean. To the boys, it was a coping mechanism.

When all the rumors started coming around, they came up with a way to deal with it. It sounds counter-productive, but it worked wonders.

Except for the fact that Louis hated every time one of the boys called him that.

He put up a fake smile, trying to mask his hurt and pain. "Yeah, of course. You too." Harry, oblivious to his tone, chuckled and turned back to his phone.

Niall picked up on it right away. "You sure you're fine?"

Louis was starting to crumble. "Yeah, I'm good." He stood up. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom."

Niall grinned. 'TMI, Lou."

He let out a fake laugh. "Sorry."

When he made it to the bathroom, he ran to the nearest stall. He suck down and brought his knees to his chest. He let it all out. The pain, the pressure, the feeling of not being wanted. All of it. His wrists were itching from where he cut last night. He grabbed them, trying to make himself feel some sort of pain. He thought he would be alone, but his pity party was crashed.

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