Tall, Dark and Handsome meets Almost Tall, Fair-Skinned and Sarcasm {Sterek}

Chapter 19: Denial

"It- that... it can't be... right? It's not right, right?" I asked haltingly. "Tell me it's not right! Tell me it's something else!" I demanded, louder than I meant to be. But I couldn't help it, I was starting to really panic.

I mean- don't get me wrong. Derek Hale is a sex god that I would throw myself at any day of the week... but this mate stuff. It's like... it's like he doesn't have a choice in the matter. Like- what if he wasn't attracted to me? What if he wasn't attracted to dudes? What if he didn't even like me? The whole concept seemed awful, and forceful. I didn't like it.

"It can't be," he decided, running his hands through his hair in a similar fashion to what I was doing now. It was something I'd never seen him do before.

"Right- okay. Okay good," I laughed nervously, nodding my head and swallowing thickly. Pretending for the sake of my sanity that I believed him.

"I think it's time to go," Derek decided as he rose to his feet, eerily calm. As in, deadly-Derek calm.

I shot to my feet hastily, somehow almost falling flat on my face with the action. Which is both preposterous and entirely natural for Stiles Stilinski. I ignored Derek's eye roll and looked longingly back at his moms journals. I thought about the hours and hours of my life I had wasted scrolling through bullshit site after bullshit site on the internet, loaded down heavily with more bullshit speculation. These were the journals of a powerful alpha werewolf. Her history and knowledge would be an utter gift, a golden resource filled with only truth- actual proven facts about real werewolves. No sifting, no guessing games. Just plain facts.

"We'll take them with us," Derek huffed, stalking forward and loading his arms with his mother's books. I blinked at his unexpected response, but decided it would be best not to comment as I smiled inwardly. When we arrived here he could barely look at them. Progress.

I felt my eyes wander to the rest of the vast library... all the information. Accurate lore on the supernatural. Goldmine.

"Der- we... we can't just leave them here," I murmured as I took in the sight of the towering shelves once more.

"Stiles, we can't take them all," he said, voice heavy with the obviousness of the statement. I knew he was rolling his eyes at my back right now.

"Could we... could we maybe come back for them?" I asked uncertainly, turning to face him with a pleading look.

I was mentally preparing my speech for the upcoming argument, about how much garbage I continuously had to sift through every time something new came up, about how valuable all of these books were to not just Scott and I, but him as well. But, and I'm sure it's the first time in history, there was no argument.

"Yes," he answered, glancing out the window towards the trees. "Now let's go," he emphasized the words with a little shove to my back in the direction of the door.

I sputtered for a moment before pumping my fist in triumph. Sweet.

"Stiles," Derek warned from behind me, and I realized I had paused in the hallway in celebration.

"Right, sorry," I stammered, picking up my pace before the werewolf tossed me over his shoulder and carried me out.

I made it out to the Jeep without incident- only to realize Derek was no longer behind me. I looked back at the house in alarm, to see him standing stock still on the ramshackle porch. His eyes were glowing their brilliant, werewolf blue and he looked like he was barely controlling himself. His arms were still laden with the books, clutched tightly against his chest. It looked like he was making a conscious effort not to rip them to shreds. My heart started to pound in my chest the longer he stood there staring.