The Wolf's Assistant

Lonley Nights

The full moon was tonight, and I was not ready to spend an entire night alone just remembering every single mistake I've made. The darkness does that to you. It spreads the ugly truth. It makes you wonder why did you do certain things, why didn't you do this or that...

I sat on my bed in the dress, holding my two long strands of lilac hair in my hands. I slipped on the headdress, sighing.

I flew out to the roof of the apartment complex. Completely invisible to everyone around me. Well, those who choose not to believe in gods and goddesses.

The sun was slowly drawing away, and I was trying not to slip under the power of The Nox.

It's happened before. When I turn into her, I purposely hurt people. And the normal side of me can do nothing but watch and wish I could stop her. I wanted to cry but I couldn't. I had to be strong or she would take advantage of my weak mind and control me. Weird to say it but, let's just say I hate myself.

Sitting on the roof, I watched my hair flow through the wind. Tonight would be stormy for I was feeling sad, I was feeling angry.

I clutched my candles tightly, sighing as I watched their lavender flames flicker. I observed them, from their ivory wax to their black wicks that never ceased to burn down. The dripping hot wax that slowly fell down the stand, hardening quickly.

I stood up, paying attention as the sun began to sink and my stars needed to rise. I made every single star sparkle just a bit more every five minutes. Once the sun was gone, I placed a few clouds here and there, and I chose for tonight's night, the canvas would be a deep blue.

I continued to spray some white flecks into the sky, while I made the sweetest and brightest moon I had ever created. I was quite proud of tonight's creation, even though I'd be the only one to truly appreciate it for what it was. I sat back, again sadly watching my candles.

I felt some raindrops on my skin as my cloaked eyes were closed. I was overthinking again, which felt awful. I was exhausted, which was rare for a nocturnal creature such as myself. A crow landed on my shoulder, squawking in my ear.

"Yes... I hear you." I chuckled, patting the crow on the head. I was a friend of crows. A bird that usually symbolized bad luck or death. But to me they were nothing but companions. Hmph. Mortals and their superstitions. They should've seen how mad they made Bastet when they thought black cats were bad luck, killing them all. Hence why the rats were given to them, leaving them with a deadly plague and no cats to kill the pests.

I let the crow jump onto my hand, he pecked at my clothes and my gloves, asking for food.

"If I had known you were coming I would've brought something, sorry." I whispered, tapping his beak.

He looked upset that I hadn't brought him anything, and he was ready to leave.

"Just kidding." I laughed, holding out a dead rat.

The crow's face lit up and he jumped straight for the rat, digging his face into the carcass.

I watched the garbage bird feast upon the flea infested creature.

"Sometimes the birds of death are my only friends." I said, smiling to the moon. Nights like these were my favorites. The kinds of nights where the rain is so heavy that you feel like it just might break down your window, the kinds of nights when the wind is so loud that you can hear it screaming your name... Nights like those are when I cannot feel happy. No one knows that the mother of this night is dying just so they can sleep. And ignore my beautiful night.

Not even the drunks and prostitutes along the streets stop to admire the night. No one ever does. No one but me.

I watched the heavy rain around me fall, and I feel it too. But my dress does not get wet. I do not feel drenched. I feel dry, mad, and empty. But that's nothing new.