"I'm an asshole. I'll admit it, I'm selfish and a fucking asshole. No I didn't miss seeing Cass wake up, it's what I did afterwards. " I say hysterically to Luke, Ashton, and Michael who are sitting around my bed patiently waiting to here what happened.

"Okay, well just take a deep breath and start from this morning" Ash says sensibly and calmly.

"I headed over there with her ballet slipper, her favourite clothes and one of those stuffed animals with the little messaging. Anyways when I woke, she stared at me and acted as if I was the best person ever. She couldn't remember anything that happened since she started going through withdrawls. She had these delusional thoughts that I was this bestest friend ever... that I had stuck to my promises. I'm filled with guilt." I stop for a breath

"You don't have to continue, Cal" Michael says quietly reaching to pat my knee

I pull away and stare at him " She hugged me and I had to spend three hours with her. Don't get me wrong, this was some amazing redo or retake. It's just that I fell in love with her again, and I knew that before all this she didn't feel that way. I remember that day we were all playing fifa, right before the crash and I heard her talking to you guys and it broke my heart. I love her and I can't take it-"

"Hey hey, woah... Cal she wasn't talking about you, she was talking about that kid you punched. She's mad about you, not at you" Luke laughs

"Shut up Luke, it's not that funny" Michael says "Continue."

"Well anyways it was lunch and I told her how I felt and that I was gonna be there for her. She asked if I was her boyfriend and I said if she wanted me to. She smiled and was gonna reply, but then h-hher mum came. Her mum is back in her life and she's sickenly sweet. Fake sweet, but she made some lame coverup story and now she's there. The one thing I promised her, to protect her and I got kicked out. Her mum wants to send her to some rehab center in France. France is on the other fucking side of the planet, I just got her back and she's going to be gone. It's fucking selfish, but I don't want her to leave.... but I did the opposite. She asked me to convince her mum, and I broke her heart. I told her that I didn't need her and that she should be with her family... I didn't want to, but her mum forced me to... otherwise she'd tell Cass about how I abandoned her. There's this image of her wearing my shirt, the santa cruz one and her face falls. She says "I love you" and then her mums go to talk to her. She's only there for 2 more weeks and then she's being shipped out. I only have two more weeks and she's gone. When we were talking she called me her happy little pill and that I was the only medicine she'd need to get through this." I take a shaky gulp of water, spilling some.

Luke and Ash stay silent, but Michael says "You really are an asshole, but not for being selfish. You're an asshole for trying to be some fucking hero. She didn't need that, all she ever wanted was for someone to love her and you fucking did. So you're going over there, heck I'm dragging you there and you are going to tell her everything. "

"Get your jacket, we're heading back to the hospital" Michael says standing up. I quickly follow him and hear him mutter "Asshole, he is such a little fuckwit... can't do anything"

I sit shotgun, next to Michael as he drives. Ashton and Luke are in the back, complaining about Luke needing to use the restroom and Ash forgetting his phone.

"Shut the hell up, if this was a movie we could be listening to the perfect song. Like Breakfast club good, turn on the radio Cal and everyone just shut up. I hate when people talk as I drive.

We quickly obey and a song by some australian comes on,(after a few, it's not this movie like) my happy little pill. Because this is gonna turn out fine isn't it... it has too.

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