Anthony mackies neice

Visit

Tw:depression, Ed, anxiety, anxiety attacks, barfing, mental abuse and physical abuse, bullying, suicide attempts, intrusive thoughts, sa (sexual assault)

👹Playlist👹
1:fake you out- twenty one pilots
2: smells like teen spirit- nirvana
3:kill somebody- yungblud
_
Friday
September 24th, 2014

Artemis's pov:

Almost a full month has passed since the sleepover with aurora.
Everything has gotten worse, my anxiety got worse, I've had panic attacks almost every single day. One week I can't get to sleep until really early in the morning or sometimes at all, and the next week I sleep all the time, I sleep in class, I sleep as soon as I get back, I never stop sleeping and I never get anything done. The bullying in school has gotten worse, they beat me up every single day at school, and the eating thing is kind of similar to the sleeping. I rarely eat unless I know I need to, but a day here or there I'll just go on some crazy spree and eat everything and lose track of what I'm eating and don't realize I'm eating that much and then feel really quilt afterwards. The sh hasn't been much different, any time I feel like I need to let air out that's what I do, which is almost every day. I've stayed in my room for the past month and have barely had a conversation with uncle Anthony at all, and I haven't seen most of the cast at all other than some picking me up or taking me to school.
Honestly, I really don't want to be here, I really want to die. Just put an end to it and make everyone happy. I'm a burden to everyone and quite frankly I'm a burden to myself as well. I'd be better off dead, I know it, and that's why soon I won't be here anymore.

It mentally hurts so much it physically hurts, I can't stand it anymore.
It's like I feel every emotion but at the same time I feel nothing, I can't even explain it. But it hurts, and it won't stop, so I'm going to make it stop.

Tom, Robert and Chris h has also been trying to Hang out with me a lot but I've denied each time lying saying I had homework when I just wanted to be alone in my room and sleep.

Anyways-

I walk down the hallway of school, my head down, and minding my own business, aurora's has been sick for the past couple of school days but came back yesterday so I'll probably see her in next period.

I only have 2 periods left, I can make it that far...right?

I walk into science and sit at the back, aurora is sitting with one of her other friends so I just do the assignment and then lay my head down.

I zone out and next thing I know I hear, "Mrs. Mackie, class was dismissed 10 minutes ago." Mrs. Idla says, I shoot my head up and look around the room to see that in fact there's no one else in the room, mrs. Idla has 7th period off so no one would be in her class at this time, "is everything okay artemis? I know I don't know you to well, but you don't seem like yourself." She says, "yea, I'm fine, I'm just a bit tired." I say, she nods.

"Okay well if you don't want to go to study hall you can stay in here, I'll be at my desk eating my salad." She says and walks to her desks and begins eating like she said, I laid my head back down and zones out once again.

After about 40 minutes the final bell rings and I hear Mrs.idla say, "that was the final bell, you have to go home now." I stand up and pack up completely and throw my bag over my shoulder, as I walk towards the door is say, "thanks for letting me stay in here." Just above a whisper and Mrs. idla responds with a "of course."