Neighbours

Chapter 92 ~ Worst Chrismtas

Dixies Pov:

I want him to see our baby......i really do but i dont want to have shared custody.

Dixie: Im not taking away bean from you but you can only see bean whenever i want you to

Noah: How often will that be?

Dixie: I dont know. Once a week?

Noah: You are taking away my family and home from me already, please let me see our baby more often than that please

Amy: Be grateful Noah. You broke Dixie and she is still willing to let you see her child!

Tim: Calm down Amy. Dixie is right, Noah needs help and he will get help. I will get a councilor for him to speak with

Noah: No!

Tim: If you want to stay here then you will accept the help! And we didnt forget about Hailey

Amy: We are doing things that she loved to do so we can remember her. Her funeral is on the 30th December, 5 days from now. The reason that we didnt tell you is because we wanted you to relax for christmas but i guess that was a big mistake on our part

Noah: Im an idiot, im sorry

Why did he look at me when he said that? I know that what they just said, brought peace to his mind and thats all that i care about. I stopped looking at him and just looked at the ground because i know that i will go back to him if i look at him but i can feel his eyes on me.....its wierd

Noah: Bab-

Dixie: We are over, there is nothing left between us!

Charli: Im sorry, i broke the both of you up

Dixie: You didnt. You just wanted to have siblings time and i didnt know about Noahs plan for the night

Madi: Im not sure whose side i should pick in this. I have always supported Noah during his break ups but i feel like this time, he deserves it

Tatum: He does

Noah: I get that i fucked up but all of you are making it sound like you wish i was fucking dead and maybe it will happen!

What the hell just happened? Noah ran up to his room and we heard a door slam. Is he going to take his life? No, he wont do that right? I turned to my mom with tears still streaming down my face as she looked at me

Dixie: Can i go check up on him? Im afraid that he might take his life

Heidi: What if he hurts you again?

Dixie: I can handle him hurting me but i cant handle the thought of him wanting to take his life

Amy: And thats where you are wrong Dixie. You are not suppose to allow him to hurt you

Dixie: Please can i go?

Tim: Go ahead but if he does anything, scream as loud as you can

I immediately got up and went to Noahs room. I opened thay door and saw him about to put a handfull of pills in his mouth. I ran up to him and knocked them out of his hand, causing him to put down his water and stand up, face-to-face with me so i took a step back

Dixie: If you are going to hurt me, im sorry

He didnt hurt me. He pulled me into a hug but i obviously didnt hug back. I know he needed it and i wanted it but i couldnt hug him back. If i did, i would end up with him in a split second again. He kissed my cheek then pulled away from the hug and wiped both of our tears

Noah: I dont expect you to forgive me now for the things that i said and did, but from the moment that i heard about Haileys funeral, i feel like im getting bettter and i will get better for you. I promise

Dixie: I cant be with you until you get completely better because im afraid that you wil hurt me so badly one day that bean or i may loose our life. I know that if this was me, you would have stuck with me and not leave me but im sorry

Noah: I get it. You are afraid of me but im going to show you that you have nothing to be afraid of when i get better

Dixie: I hope you do. Also, dont try to take your life again. I will die with guilt

And with that, i walked out of the room and back into the living room. I know Noah.....i know he will work on himself. If not for me then for bean but i know that he will get better, he just needs time

Amy: Was everything ok?

Dixie: He was about to overdose but i smacked it out of his hand

Tim: Oh my

Heidi: Dont take on any kind of stress, you hear me Dixie. It isnt healthy for your baby

Dixie: Mom, i cant loose him. I may be afraid of him now but i know that he is going to get better for bean and me. The way that he is being treated, isnt right because what i saw just now, i dont wish to ever see that again. He was never the kind to think abiut suicide as an escape but he did today and was about to kill himself

Amy: That isnt like Noah. Tim, you need to get him someone to talk to. We cant loose two of our babies

Tim: I know. Im going to call Jack now. He is a specialist in mental health, family and relationship counciling and thats what Noah needs right now

Dixie: Can you set up an appointment for Noah now so he will be occupied and my mind will be at ease?

Noah: Im stressing you out, arent i?

When did Noah come down? I didnt even see him there? I cant just tell him that his actions is stressing me out, because it is but i dont want him to feel bad. I need him to get better and not feel worst

Dixie: No

He walked up to me and looked at me in the eyes and i can see that he is feeling sorry and bad for what he did

Noah: I know that you dont want anything to do with me right now but can i touch your stomach to speak to bean?

Dixie: Only this one time until you get better

Noah stooped down on his knees and rest both of his hands on my stomahch

Noah: Hi bean, its daddy. You wont be hearing from me for a while because im going to be trying to get better for you and mommy. While im away, take care of mommy and dont kick her or cause her any kind of pain. I always cause her pain so she dont need you causing her pain also. Im leaving here today and going in a hotel until i get better then hopefully my parents, your grandparents, will allow me to come back here. Its christmas today and i ruined it for everyone. When you are born and you get to know how i treated your mom the last 2 times when i was angry, you probably wont even want to see my face hence i enjoy speaking to you while you are in mommy tummy. I love you bean

He kissed my belly then stood up and started walking out the living room to go up to his room but i stopped him by speaking

Dixie: Noah!

He turned back around and looked at me, confused

Dixie: Bean will never leave you. I wont tell bean anything so bean will always want to see you whenever bean isnt with you

Noah: Which is 6/7s of the week that bean will be with you. Thank you Dixie

He rolled his eyes then walked up to his room. I sat on the couch and put my head on my hands

Dixie: I am the reason why he is like this now. I never do what he wants. He wants to see bean more than once a week and i dont think i can do that

I got up and ran out of the house, entered my home, into my room and locked the door. I took a pillow and cried into it because im sure if i wasnt so stubborn then he wouldnt have gotten so. Its christmas and everyone is so fucking stressed and some are even sad now. This is the worst fucking christmas ever. I have dreamt since i was a little child that christmas could never be a bad day but dreams dont alway be true. I hate that i am to blame for all this. I cried and cried until i fell asleep.

Word Count: 1492words