Hold me close

chapter 2- je te laisserai

Eventually I let go, I had to. I faced the fact that it was never coming back to that point again, and it was time for me to work on myself. It was only after when I realised how the whole situationship affected me. My insecurities of my body shape, my skin, the way I dressed, made me anxious. We remain talking as friends, but I for one, never allow myself to fall back into feelings again, it was best left as friends. I knew I could do better than Aaron and that someone will come into my life that makes me feel like no one else matters. Cliché I know, but it was something I stood by.

I did better for myself over the next couple of months. I worked on my body that I was so insecure about, I worked on my skin care, focused on my education and from there I felt restored as a person, not letting drama or specifically Aaron be a distraction from the track I was heading in. When I started to feel confident in myself, he came back. Running back if I were brutally honest. Aaron began to talk more often, try to call me, or talk about plans for the next time we went camping. I knew what he was trying to do, sometimes I'd catch myself giving into it, but never too far. This time it was my turn to deal the cards, I played hard to get. I knew truly that I would never date him again if it came to it, I couldn't settle for less.

Dahlia for unknown reasons, kept in contact with Aaron, but continued to try make me like him again. She wouldn't leave me alone about it. To me, she seemed desperate and too involved in his life, I was starting to ship them more than I use to with me. I didn't know what her intentions were, but it bugged me. This time, Aaron would watch me walk away, away to somebody who could treat me the way Aaron never could.