I dare you to love me

Ch. 6 same difference

Three hours later, at about seven, Sam walked into the library. He saw the stack of books that had begun to grow around me and realized what I was doing. "Hey, Dean and I are gonna pick up some food, do you want me to bring you something?" He said as he sat down in one of the wooden chairs. "Nope," I said, not even looking up to meet Sam's concerned eyes. "And you haven't eaten in what, two days? If you keep this up, we might have to force it in you." Now I looked up. "Sam, if you think I'm not eating on purpose, then you have come to the wrong conclusion. You know my antibiotics just make me not hungry," I said as I put the book down a little too forcefully. Sam signed, his chest rising and falling. He did look really good in the flannel he was wearing. The red and black plaid just made me want to cuddle all day with him. "Fine. But keep this up, and you'll run out of excuses," Sam exclaimed as he got up and left. I didn't want to lie to Sam, even though me being not hungry was half true. I wasn't hungry at the time, but the real reason I wasn't eating was because every time I ate, it felt foreign.

A long time ago, I had starved myself, but Dean had noticed my lack of eating. He questioned me about it, and I said I was being anti social and was eating in my room by myself. Dean was still concerned, but let me go. But three days later we went on a hunt, and I had gotten really dizzy. I couldn't focus on anything, and the werewolf caught up to me and cut my stomach open. Sam and Dean had found me unconscious lying in a pool of blood.

After that, I told them the truth, and now I have to eat or I get nothing but concerned looks. But now it always feels a little weird to eat things and feel full. So every once in a while, I starve for a little bit, get that empty feeling again.

My eyes were getting droopy and that was the cue to stop reading and take a break. I walked to where my dad was staying and walked in. "Hello," my dad said cheerfully, as he inspected his room: why was he so damn curious about this place? "Hey. We forgot to test you earlier, so mind if I do it now?" I said. "Sure," my dad mumbled. He was fiddling with the bed again. "I've seen this place before, though I don't know where," he whispered to himself.

I ran to the kitchen to go get the salt and holy water. After I poured the salt into the holy water I headed over to my room to grab some silver. Then I went to go retrieve the anti demon mixture, when I fell to my knees, and started coughing. The world was spinning around me, and I had to put my hand on the wall next to me to support my weight. I had forgotten I was holding the silver knife, and cut my hand. But I couldn't feel it because I was focusing on breathing.

I had to get my inhaler. I supported myself against the wall as I tried to find my room. I took two steps when I fell down again, this time no wall to help me. "Amy!" I heard a scream, but I couldn't figure out who it was. "What do you need?" The voice said. "In-inh-inh-" I struggled to say 'inhaler'. "What are you saying? Amy!" "Inha-Inhaler!" I squeaked. I was starting to get tunnel vision. If the voice didn't get my inhaler soon, I might die.

Key word "might". I would definitely pass out, but if I don't clear out my chest, it would get so full of mucus that it would block any air way to my brain.

I didn't realize I was laying flat on the floor. I soon felt soft hands roll me over. Then the hands reached my face, trying to get my attention. "Amy, stay with us," the hands were Cas. Was he the voice that was talking to me earlier? No, it couldn't be. Cas would've known what I needed, he wouldn't have to ask me. Soon I was being lifted bridal style.

Now I was coughing so bad blood was coming up. The crimson blood was the brightest thing I could see, like a diamond in the rough. The coughed up blood spilled onto Castiel's clean white shirt, I think. I could barely see anything now, on the verge of unconscious. What caused this sudden attack? I mean, it's not like I was getting a cold, or another chest infection. Yea, I would wheeze here and there, but not this. This was backed up fluids. This was serious. I started to lose feeling in my arms and legs. "Amy, I'm going to give you your inhaler, can you use it?" I gave my head a small shake, and that took all my energy away. My eyelids fell lazily over my eyes, and I let the darkness overcome me.

But the darkness didn't last long. The cold plastic of my inhaler hit my lips, and I breathed in the medicine. I felt the oxygen entering my body, the blood flowing back into my limbs. I heard a "thank god" come from the voice. I looked over to see the voice was my dad. My actual dad was concerned about me. That's a first.

I laid my head back on the soft surface, maybe a pillow? I was too weak to do anything but lay down. I felt around me. I was on a bed, in a room. I knew that much. I tried to sit up again, but Cas pushed me back on the bed. "You need to rest. We'll discuss this later," he said as he nodded at my dad, then left the room.

But my dad didn't leave, not until he said "I'm sorry that I couldn't help you. I didn't know what to do, so I yelled for your teleport friend," he said as he sat at the end of the bed. I turned over to look at him. His skin had been exposed to so much sun he looked like an old piece of leather. "My 'teleport friend' has a name, you know," I laughed. " his name's Castiel, and he's an angel." Dad didn't freak out when I said that. Not that I was surprised that he didn't react. Once you get into the hunting business, nothing really surprises you anymore. Dad smiled, and left.

I started to drift off to sleep, already knowing what will happen when Sam and Dean come back from the food run. They'd be like "you almost died." And I would make a come back about how I didn't almost die I almost passed out and they would say "same difference".

Before I fell asleep, I couldn't stop thinking about how my dad actually tried to help me.

Maybe he did change.