dead wrong (l.h)

"enlighten me"

chapter six
evelyn

6:32 PM
Thursday, September 9

"I can't believe you're doing this, Eves." Calum said as he laid down on my bed with his hands covering his face. He'd been keeping me company as I got ready for the last two hours. Most of that time was spent by me pacing, regretting, and worrying—I had only spent the last twenty minutes actually getting dressed. "I understand why you're doing it, I get you wanting to try, but... I just can't believe you're gonna see him. In real-time. I mean, what'll that be like?" 

"I love you, but you suck at making me feel better," I told Calum as I stepped in front of his legs that were hanging off the side of the bed. He moved his hands from his face and revealed a pout.

"I'm sorry, sweets," he apologized before sitting up with a huff. I crossed my arms across my chest and he pulled me closer before placing his hands on the sides of my arms. "This'll be good for you. You'll finally get all the answers you've wanted, hopefully. And you'll get the closure you've needed." I bit my lip gently as I looked at Calum, letting my eyes wander around his features as I thought to myself. "What's going on up there?" he asked, taking one of his hands from my arm and gently tapping the side of my head.

"What isn't going on up there?" I replied with a scoff. "I'm scared, Cal. What if he's gotten worse? What if there's no resemblance to the person I knew? He had started to fade so much by the end of it all, but there was still a glimpse of him there. But what if he's all gone?"

"Eves, I know that'll be hard, but... that'll be your answer?" Calum didn't seem sure how to respond to my questions, but he had been honest and he was right to say so. It would be an answer, but it was the answer I most dreaded. Calum pulled me into his arms and held me tight, which I reciprocated. My eyes closed as I held him just as tightly as he held me. "Throw my name into the conversation a time or two... would you?" I slowly pulled away from Calum and placed my hands on his shoulders. "Nothing special, nothing crazy... just see how he reacts?"

"You miss him, don't you?" I asked him softly, taking note of the look in his eyes.

"Of course I do, Evie," he admitted in a dejected tone before dropping his eyes from my own. "I don't miss him being an ass to you, but I can't help but think back on how good things used to be."

"Before I messed it all up by falling in love with him?" I asked through a pathetic laugh. Calum looked back up at me and sent me an unamused look.

"He's the one that fucked things up and you know it," Calum told me as he started to gently shake his head. "I cannot blame you for having feelings for him when it was so clear you guys had chemistry. Despite how it ended, you guys were the real thing. There was a time when I couldn't imagine you two not together. You were good for each other at the time."

"Maybe... but sometimes I just really wish we had never gone to the trouble," I told Calum as I began to play with the strings of his hoodie. "I shoulda fell in love with you instead," I joked as I patted his chest—I felt as though things had become too serious, so I wanted to lighten the mood.

"There's always still time," Calum joked back which sent me laughing. "Don't wish away the time you two had, okay? Especially now that you're getting a chance to see if maybe something could be revived. Friend-wise... of course."

"We'll see," I said with a sad smile. "But the only way that can happen is if I actually go meet with him." I glanced toward the alarm clock on my nightstand to see I only had about ten minutes before I would need to leave. "How do I look?"