perfect

19 1 0
                                    

The girl in the mirror always lies.

She doesn't have a name, just a whisper of flesh and spirit in an empty world. She stares back at me with dull pink eyes, always watching and judging, hoping to steal any moment of my time.

And she does. I'll gaze back into her perfect face to see the girl everyone else does, but it hurts. It hurts so bad to look so pristine when deep inside I know how much I hate her.

Because I do. I hate her so much. All I want is for the white porcelain to crack for just a moment. Just to see that she isn't what everyone says she is, that she has flaws and faults, but doesn't deserve the pain I know she feels under her cool features.

But she never does.

And that hurts more.

***

There is this new girl in my chemistry class. 

Ms. Finch said her name was Winter andit fits her perfectly from her white hair to her high cheekbones. Her aura is enrapturing. She doesn't look like anyone I've ever seen before. 

Her albinism makes her unique and she holds herself with a kind of courage no one else can. Her gait is strong and her gaze feirce. It is as if she knows all eyes are on her. I don't envy the stares, but I long to be as special as she is.

As for her character, how am I to know? I've only just watched her walk in the halls. I haven't even spoken more than two words in her mere direction. Even so, just by watching, I can tell she is good at everything. She never slows when running laps in P.E., she hasn't once faltered in answering any question sprung upon the class, she never denounces an ounce of her character in any fashion. 

It's as if she's...well,.. perfect.

***

I started at a new school last Monday. 

My parents wanted to move again, but it's not as if they asked for my input. Not that they would have noticed. Or cared. I love them, but even though I never have to want for anything, I wonder if they love me. They wanted a flawless daughter, but instead, they ended up with a freak.

I was worried that I would be outcasted again, because of how I looked. I'm just...different. It's not like I got a choice or that I can change it, but people won't seem to accept that.  I hoped this school would be different.

My first class was Chemistry. After I was introduced, I took the only available seat. All of the stares seem to burn holes into my skin, slowly worming their way into my flesh like leeches soaking up my happiness. I watched as a student a few seats in front of me turned to his friends and whispered something until they erupted into muffled giggles.

They were laughing at me. Ghost. That's what they were calling me. I wish I could turn into a ghost and go unnoticed, blending into the crowd and finally find some peace.

I tried to ignore everyone, but it's proved to be a daunting task. The girl next to me dropped her pencil and the sound caught my attention. She had chocolate brown hair that flowed to her mid-back, kaleidoscope hazel eyes flecked with gold, and smooth almond skin splashed with freckles. She is beautiful. She is everything I want to be.

She is normal. 

I managed to catch her name yesterday, Mari, which somehow suits her in every way. She was called upon by the teacher, Ms. Fitch I believe, to balance an equation. I could tell she had been doodling in her notebook, yet responded promptly even if it was quiet in volume with a slight stutter.

She seems to be wonderful in character. She politely holds open the door for strangers and is well-mannered. She is shy but is well received by other people in smaller groups. I find myself watching for her in the halls. She always glides down the corridor with such an air of calm and serene. I long to walk beside her, but don't want to bring hardship upon her. Our peers would insult her for talking to someone so stained.

Because I'm aberrant and she's...well,.. perfect.

***

Mirrors always mock me. 

I stare into my reflection to see only the same, plain girl I always do. The girl who fades into the background, never to be noticed again. The girl who can't seem to be heard no matter how loud she screams. The girl who can't seem to change.

The girl who is average. Usual. Normal. 

My parents named me after the flower Marigold which grew in the fields around their hometown in Mexico. Mama gave me the nickname Mari, and it stuck, but Papa called me his flower. He made me feel special, but then he was gone. He died from a car crash when I was seven and the twins were still encapsulated in my mother's womb. She stayed strong, so why couldn't I?

I'm not tough as nails pounding into weathered stones; I'm not super skinny with perfect hair and a dazzling smile. I can't effortlessly wear anything and look amazing without trying. I don't wake up with my plain brown hair perfectly curled and makeup flawlessly sculpted like in the movies. I'm not rich and I take the bus. I can't afford designer clothes and I work at a dingy diner. I've never even had a partner!

I don't go out so how could I ever get one because I have to take care of my younger siblings. I love my Mama and she is doing the best she can as a single mother. She takes extra shifts at the hospital just to pay for food. She is selfless, but it has just become expected of me to drop everything for my twin siblings. I understand, but I just once want to do something fun and unexpected. Just once I want to do whatever I want.

Just once I want to feel special.

I want to feel perfect.

***

This short story is all about your perception of yourself and how others see you. It delves into the minds of two girls who happen to meet at their school, each wishing to become the other because they are, in their eyes, perfect. Both are facing their own unique difficulties while navigating their senior year of high school and happen upon the other in their Chemistry course. They seem to be enthralled by the other, each wishing for attributes that their peer contains. I wrote this to prove that something you are wishing you could change is wanted desperately by another. So, love yourself for who you are.

Thanks for reading!

You've reached the end of published parts.

⏰ Last updated: Dec 01, 2021 ⏰

Add this story to your Library to get notified about new parts!

A Collection of Short StoriesWhere stories live. Discover now