Once in a lifetime.

34

August

Dalton

Just like any other show, I warm up, both by myself and with the band. They sound great, I however can't get my head straight so I go to my dressing room and sit on the couch in the back. I checked my phone, but I still have no service. Running my hand through my hair I sigh. No word from Juliet in almost two weeks, and I'm starting to worry. A knock at my door brings me back to earth.

"Come in."

I say, my hand still in my hair.

"Damn dude. You look like crap."

It takes me a second to recognize the voice but as soon as I do a smile slaps onto my face.

Cayden and Will are like brothers to me, although I'm pretty close with all of the guys I knew Cayden before we started the band thing together. His brother, himself, and I use to write songs together before we ever auditioned for 'Lay it down Sunshine' and he was one of the only ones that didn't shun me for walking away from School Of Rock and wanting to do my own thing. In fact, he followed me to that audition with me. We later found out Will, another guy from the same city and school was coming to audition. I feel bad for Luca and Alex, but it's hard to compete with that. I pull him into a hug for longer than we both expected.

"You okay?" He laughs and I do my best to force a laugh as well. Cayden looks at me and his forehead wrinkles a little, "uh oh, not the fake laugh."

I sigh and look at him right in the eye and reply with, "Not at all." Of course, Cayden being Cayden forces me over to the couch to tell him. Not all guys would do that at least not any of my friends. If it wasn't for me having a show in an hour we'd go play video games and talk it out.

"Tell me it isn't about Juliet." He says as he sits.

"Then you might as well drop it."

"Dalton, I liked her, I thought all was going well? What did you do?"

"Me?" I ask pretending to be offended but actually being quite hurt over the comment.

"Yes, you. Must I remind you that you are the one traveling? Not her."

I become quiet. "I think she's pregnant."

Cayden's eyes grow large and his mouth drops open. "Think? What do you mean 'think'? You can't just think your girlfriend is pregnant without knowing. What makes you think that anyway? Did you two, ya know?" Cayden has always been polite about saying intimate words, like sex.

"Well, she's been having weird cravings and getting sick every morning. She even left me a few messages panicking because her period was late."

"Messages?" I nod"You mean to tell me that you knew this was happening and you allowed her to call to go through to voice mail?"

"I was in the middle of a show. What was I supposed to do when my phone isn't even on me?"

"Fair enough. At least tell me that you're planning on going to see a doctor with her after the show." I sit quietly not responding to that question because I know I won't have time. "Dalton, you've got to be shitting me." I blink at him because Cayden doesn't normally cuss.

What I don't tell him is that I'm scared to see her. "She stopped texting, stopped calling. What if she already knows?"

"Then it's your duty as a father or even not a father, to your girlfriend to check up on her."

"But what if that was all fake?"

Cayden laughs, and even though the sound warms my heart I know he's about to say something to make me want to make him leave. "You honestly think Juliet made all this up? She's been waiting for you, like a dog waiting for its master, and you think she's making this up?"I'm quiet for a moment, knowingness his right. "I see what you're doing."

He says leaning back and crossing his arms. "You're pushing her away because you know that you won't be around enough if she is having a baby." I don't answer, because I know that subconsciously that is what I'm doing.

"Dalton, stop making her fight for you. She did it long enough. Does she even know about your mental health state? I know everything has been rough."

"No," I say finally speaking. My tone is angry but I'm on the brink of tears.

"You have to tell her what's going on, she's sticking out the distance, I think she'll want to know. Plus maybe it'll even help her understand what's going on."

I shake my head no "You don't get it."

Cayden looks at me hurt, "I don't?"

We sit in silence for a while before he laughs and stands up to leave. "Have a good show, Dalton." I know he knows what's going on. He knows better than just about anyone, he knows what's going on with me and if I told him what was going on with Jules he'd get that too.

I turn my head in the opposite direction so I don't have to watch him leave, When I think he's gone I turn my head in the direction he left, but to my surprise, he's still standing there.

"Last time I checked. You weren't the one knocked up by a rockstar who can't even text his girlfriend to see if she's doing okay. You know something Dalton, I thought that when you told me Juliet was pregnant, I thought you'd be a good dad. I thought that even though you were on the road all of the time I thought that you'd make an exception. I thought that you would go be with her to see if she was actually pregnant, I thought you were a better guy than one that's going to choose to ignore her. She might be carrying your child and all you can do is ignore her and pretend like she doesn't exist? Pretend as if she has done something wrong.  You've changed a lot Dalton, and I feel sorry for Juliet and that baby. And I'm telling you this, if you don't go check on her I will, because that baby is going to need someone to call dad, and Juliet doesn't deserve to go through this alone."

And with that, he left my dressing room. I picked up a pillow and threw it at the door angry because I can't get myself to do everything he's just told me to do. There are monsters in my head and they scare me, I don't want Juliet to be scared of them too.