You're Pretty Ugly when You Cry

See Me in PERSONAL

I'm taken aback when people ask me to describe myself.

How do I describe my personhood?

I want to be as honest as possible to delude you of fantasies of perfect coca-cola bodies, perfect curves, flawless skin, shiny black hair, nice smile...

I have, am, always been fat. No, not the skinny bitch whining "Oh my god, I'm so fat....i'm only size 0, why can't i be -0???"

I'm fat. My medical record shows that I am over and above my normal weight. 29 is my BMI. So yes, I am FAT. FATSI. I am chubby, my belly fat is so soft you want to poke it like how you poke a marshmallow.

I have trouble picturing myself naked im front of a mirror sometimes. Will somebody want to love this kind of body....because sometimes I find it difficult to love...

I don't want to be skinny. I want to learn to love my body. I want to be comfortable looking at myself when I'm naked. I want to be able to stand up for myself to people who ask me " WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?"

For the record, I have always been chubby... But i have a great personality... a personality that can blow your mind. My body fails to cooperate but hey, my brain is the sexiest part of me.