I hurt myself today,
To see if I still feel.
I focus on the pain,
The only thing that's real.
These days, the pain is the only thing that's real... The pain of death, of sorrow, of grief... Of everything that I've done. I killed Leena out of insanity as well, that's right... K-Killed her... Shot dead, by my very own self. She was a member of my team, my little family from the Warehouse, and yet I couldn't stop myself.
The needle tears a hole,
The old familiar sting.
Try to kill it all away,
But I remember everything.
If only I had managed to fight myself, then none of this would have happened... I wouldn't be currently be lying here slumped against a wall, a blade lodged deep in my chest, Claudia crying herself half to death in front of me, Pete and Myka unknowing of what to do. Help me? Don't help me? They honestly don't know. I don't know what they should do either...
What have I become?
My sweetest friend.
Everyone I know goes away,
In the end.
And you could have it all,
My empire of dirt.
I will let you down,
I will make you hurt.
The damage and destruction I have now caused is astounding. This virus, it's already spreading through the Earth's air, you can literally feel it in the sky... There is no cure for this, and I can tell you this now, I certainly won't be the one to find it... I can't, can I? Or can I? I can't really tell what's going on at the moment, apart from the things I see in my garbled thoughts.
I wear this crown of thorns,
Upon my liar's chair.
Full of broken thoughts,
I cannot repair.
There was no way out of this, but there wasn't a happy medium to begin with. It was either everyone went suicide because of loss of all hope, or this... And in the end, everyone would die either way. There is no way for everyone to live. The only way for this to stop is death. The death of the human race all together, I suppose...
Beneath the stains of time,
The feelings disappear.
You are someone else,
I am still right here.
These words would probably be what Claudia would have said because of this, had she managed to get a word in. She's too busy crying infront of me, with Pete and Myka, making a futile attempt to save me whilst they die as well. They realise that the evil has left me, that now I am sane. They also realise that there is nothing else they can do, now. They realise the world cannot be saved.
What have I become?
My sweetest friend.
Everyone I know goes away,
In the end.
And you could have it all,
My empire of dirt.
I will let you down,
I will make you hurt.
I wish there was something I could do, to comfort them all, to comfort the world... If only I had fought past my insanity, found a cure before it fully grasped my mind. Or even better, if only I had listened to Adrian and his Brotherhood, and just left the world be. I should have realised there would be no way out of something so severe as this, and left the Astrolabe alone.
If I could start again,
A million miles away.
I would keep myself,
I would find a way.
