YOUR guide to LOVE and ATTRACTION

Rule 1: Don't Overdo a Smile...It Just Looks Weird.

CONGRATS!!!! You've won... A SPECIAL OH SO FABULOUS FANTASTIC PRIZE!!!! W0oT!! What is it you ask? No, no, its not a pony *laughs*. I... can't afford a unicorn.... My barbie pegasus can't fit through the tiny computer screen, I'm sorry *getting annoyed*. JESUS!!!! STOP WITH THE MUTATED, ENHANCED, SUPER PONIES ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okaayyy, continuing. So what is really your prize? DONT YOU DARE ANSWER. It's learning about my life. Okay, not that great BUT... Would you seriously rather listen to the lecture your health teacher's making about 'personal space' and 'body parts'??? Yes, I know your secretly reading wattpad during your class period. I won't rat you out... If you listen. AND I'LL GIVE YOU CAKE TOO!!! No...NOT CUPCAKES just regular cakes.

Okay people sitting in the audience, reading my thoughts that are typed onto the computer. LET'S BEGIN THE 'VIVIAN JUSTICE SHOW!!!" Applausing in the audience. Thank you, thanks soo much for wasting your time reading this useless crap.

Let's start with the basics people. No HoorayForPie, you may not take a bathroom break from the show. No Sceline, I DON'T KNOW WHO TOM AND JUSTIN ARE!!!!!!

Okaayy, back to the point... Am I popular? NOO!!!! everyone shouts 'no' at the same time as me. Did I loose my v-card yet? NOO!!!!! Everyone shouts with me. Do I have really good friends? NOO!!!! Everyone shouts with me, again. Am I giving you cake? NOO!!!! Everyone shouts with me and then shares glances.

HAH!!! I don't owe you cake anymore. Boo Hoo for you. Fine. I give you pokemon. POKE!!! a mon. There...happy?

True, I HAD a friend, her name was Joanne. And guess what? She friggen betrayed me to become the mindless zombie popular... something we agreed NOT to do on. I mean, being popular would be pretty rad, but still. She BETRAYED!!! She left me for a boy.

Gasps in the audience.

I know, I know. I can't get back at her yet. Its all too soon.

Scene of the epic TV show: A park...

I saw Joanne in the corner of my eye. Talking to the lovely Kendall. Ohh I hear the wedding bells now. SWEET MOTHER OF MERCY!!!!

Kendall's a popular. She kissed him. He couldn't care less. The popular rising began.

Joanne waved at me. I smiled, and EXTREMELY fake smile. I looked weird and yes, it'd just make me more hated and social freakish. I can't help it.

Joanne was going to get it someday... someday soon...