Goodbye's Second Chance

All We Can Do is Keep Breathing

******************************

TW/CW: Assault/hate speech.

This one hurts. I'm sorry. 

******************************

1 Month Later

Leaving Iwa for a second time in California was almost harder than the first, knowing that I really was not going to see him again for a while. We texted all the time and face timed when we could though; more than one occasion found us both falling asleep on the phone. It wasn't the same as being with him, obviously, but it was a million times better than not speaking to him at all.

I'd forgotten how easy it was to just talk with him. I hadn't felt this at ease since high school. We were us again, but this time, there was nothing hidden between us. It finally felt like everything was in its rightful place; I was playing better, I hadn't had a panic attack since coming back from our tournament in California, I was actually getting sleep, Iwa was laughing and smiling again, getting top marks again in school.

Iwa was returning to Tokyo for school come Christmas, so he was busy packing his things and trying to remotely find and new apartment. He didn't want to go back to the dorms, since he'd soon be in his third year of school. His mom was bugging him to just move home, but he didn't want that either. It was kind of surprising that he was defying his parents, given how strict he was raised. He was still very much a vault of secrets when it came to certain things.

His mother was like a second mother to me, but she was very traditional and old fashioned in her beliefs sometimes. My mom was always trying to get her to loosen up, and there were times I felt like Oba-san came over to get away from the demands of a traditional household. In all the years I'd known Iwa, I'd never become friendly with his father. He was always cold and didn't talk much. Dinners at Iwa's when his father was home were always tense.

Haji never spoke much about him other than 'they didn't get along'. More than once after our first real fight in high school, I wondered if he got his temper from his father. I wanted to ask him if he was the reason he wanted to live away from home, but that wasn't a conversation I wanted to have over the phone. We'd have time when I got back to Tokyo to talk, and it was something that could wait.

It was my second summer-winter in Buenos Aires and it still tripped me out that I was wearing shorts in December to go Christmas shopping. I had to keep reminding myself that I was buying for my family and not just Iwa. I couldn't decide exactly on what to get him. I wanted to get him couples' rings, but I thought it might be a little early for that or that it might freak him out since he wasn't out yet to anyone and it would raise too many questions.

I had to pack a second suitcase of just presents for everyone, but I didn't mind. I was excited to go home this year. I wished there was some way I could have coordinated flights with Iwa, but it would have been way too expensive and would have wasted a whole day just to get on a flight that we both would sleep through. At least, that was the reasoning he used to convince me not to do it. He was going a day before me, so at least he'd be there when I got there.

The plane touched down and I practically ran through the airport to get my bags. I texted him as soon as I got off the plane, but was so busy getting my bags and getting through customs, I didn't have a chance to see if he responded. I finally got through and was walking towards the cab stand when I felt it buzz in my pocket. "I'm about to catch a cab." I said as I answered it. "Look up." Was all he said.