SOULS OF DIFFERENT AGES

warped perceptions

adolescence was experienced through the warped perceptions 

of having circus mirrors for eyes

the days were a little shorter, autumn a lot longer 

and my tiny body didn't hold the crushing weight of paranoia 

that comes with looking down at shiny oxford's stepping on decaying leaves

and the next second,

looking up at a gray sky, white droplets of crystalized gloom 

dusting my eyelashes

i sometimes wonder

when did i realize this world was too big for me?

too big to possibly know everything there is to know

too big to be everywhere and nowhere all at once

maybe it was when nasty things of the world began to infect adolescence

until all that was left was trauma and old age 

somebody knows, just not me

as a child, the towering trees that once brought comfort

 now hold a foreignness of something so close yet so outside of reach

youth

and the unwavering hope and innocence 

of simply not knowing 

and not wishing to.