An Early Mourner

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         Chatpter one

             The sting of my tears burn my face as I gaze upon her still body.  There she lie, cold and still.  Her red hair lifeless and stiff.  She was done up like an angel.  A long white silky dress complimented by the purple satin lining of the casket.  The smell of freashly carved wood stung my nose, and lingered everywhere in the room.  How had I gotten to this point?  Couldn't the angels suffice for anybody else?  She was practically my mother.  Up and walking around just days before, touching everybody's heart.  Memories play back in my head of the last trip I went on with her.  A cheerleading trip, to the basketball state championships.  She had come to give the cheerleaders support.  Every game she was there.  Her long hair neatly straightened down the curves of her back, cane in hand sitting on the bleachers video taping us.  She was our momma bear and we loved her.  I flash back to the present, stil standing infront of her final bed.  Silent tears streaked my face as I walked away.  I was waiting for somebody to stand up and say, "Will the real Sharon stand up and show yourself now?"  and she would walk in laughing and say this was all just a joke.  But it never happened.  I continued to walk towards the chappel where the services would take place.  A sudden blast of flowers hits my nose, and i start to cry more as i realize that she was really gone.  The piano played a sad song that might has well been titled, We all should just die now because this world just sucks ass.  Nobody could bring  her back, no matter how many times they said "I'm sorry for your loss."   I can never see her again.  The music stops playing as the man in the front stands and says "will the congregation please arise."

We all arose, i, almost falling over at the sight, they wheeled in the closed casket which was followedby a presession of mourners, family members and friends.  Several crying, little kids sobbing.  A baby in the background sets the mood with her screaming of her own.  several hundred people walk into the chappel in this sad sad line.  Silent tears still just streak my face.  we all sit down and some of her family members come to the front and sing a special song for sharon, it was her favorite.  An early Goodbye.  This song was played at my brothers funeral and it automaticly sends sobbs through my lungs.  My stomach starts convulsing, and my heart rate quickens, i could'nt breath and at that moment, I didnt want too.  I grab my friends hand and i violently convulse on the church pue.  Tears falling more and more and more, wetting my lap.  I try to calm myself as I tilt my head back towards the ceiling.  evrything becomes a blur as i slump into my friends lap.  The song slowley fades away.



Chapter two      (four months earlier)

               "Come on! lets try out for the squad, you will deffinatly make it, please please please?"  My friend Gabby was yanking on my arm.  Our school was having tryouts for a cheerleading squad.  I had been a cheerleader already, but didn't really want to do it all that much again.  Gabby's long blonde hair fell infront of her face as she jumped up and down like an excited little girl who just got a puppy.  Her jumps yanked my arm causing me to jolt all over the place.                                             "Fine!" I finally gave in and her blue eyes sparkeled like a fresh water spring, she was so excited, and I couldn't have that excitment be the reason she takes my arm off.  "Really?"  She stood still and waited for a reply, "Sure, why not?  It won't kill me, or anybody else if i'm a cheerleader.  At least I hope it won't."  She giggled at my childish response.  And she began to jump all over the school courtyard again.  The October breeze felt nice as it blew through my hair.  I watched gabby hop the fence onto the grass and begin to wildly throw kicks and staart to do her cheer.  She would need alot of practice in the next four days if she wanted to be a cheerleader.  I giggled to myself as I too hopped the fence and ran and tackeled her.  I pin her down to the ground to calm her down           "Deep breaths sweety, dont overwork yourself."  She smiled and then took a deep breath, then when i thought she was clmed enough I let her go.  She slowley gets up, wiping the grass off of her pants, and I turned and started to walk away.  "Come on, lets get home so we can practice our routines."  She got silent and I just kept walking.  All of the sudden, two hands wrap around my waist and take me down, she laughs loudly as she pins me down on the ground.  "Gabby, this looks weird, stop it!"   She gets quiet and stares at me intently, it was scary.  Her hand comes up and is poised to strike.  She brings it down with hard force on my forehead.  "Hey! what the hell was that for?"  She plucks something off and it was a dead ant on my forehead. "Your welcome."  She says in a teasing way.  I rub my forehead as she gets off of me and puts her hand out to help me up.  "Gabby, I love you darling."  I smile "I love you too."  we take eachothers hand and walk away.


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