It's Just A Number

Chapter 1

Makia

"what is one thing you hate on your body?" Dr.Reynolds asked me as we stood in front of the long mirror. This was my fifth session and I can say that I am making progress.

I stood in front of the long wooded mirror dressed in my bathing suit. I slowly scanned my body thinking of what I didn't like.

"My arms because of the cuts." I said rubbing over my cuts with my fingers.

"Hmm why did you cut yourself what comfort did that give you ?" I sighed loudly getting a little frustrated and annoyed.

"I didn't get any comfort out of it, I just did it because I wanted too." I said shrugging. She looked at me through the mirror shaking her head.

"Think before you speak that was complete bull Makia now I'm going to ask you again why did you cut yourself and what comfort did you get from it?" She asked with a more demanding tone. I looked down at my arms thinking. I wiped the tear that was slowly falling down my face.

"I don't know Dr.Reynolds... I was angry with myself at how I let my life go down hill I wanted to end the hurt and pain I was feeling in my heart. I wanted to die because I felt that I had no reason to live I was just a waste" I said sobbing uncontrollably. She handed me a tissue.

"what do other people think of you and what do you think they would say too you now?"

"People would call me every name in the book, they made sure they hurt me with each word they spat out. I still think some people would say hurtful words to me and some would see that I've changed so they'll stop judging me." I said I honestly think nobody would actually care if I did change my ways.

She walked away going to her notepad writing something

she handed it too me. " Do you believe in yourself Makia? I don't want you to give up on yourself because you feel so angry about the decisions you made. There is other ways to handle this situation instead of leading to this." She said grabbing my arms.

"Your a very beautiful young lady I believe you can achieve all of your goals throughout this whole process. Your slowly achieving your goals. I want you to read this once you go back to your room and hang it up on your bathroom mirror to look at every morning and read out loud."I nodded and grabbed my robe tying it around my body.

"You did wonderful today I'll see you at the group session later."

I walked out walking down the hall with Tyson he was the security guard for my hallway. He was very annoying when I first met him but he is cool. We do bump heads a lot maybe because we're both Pisces

"How was it today?" he asked. I sighed.

"It was fine just tired of talking about everything really I just want to forget about it honestly." I said looking up at him.

"Well you can't just ignore your problems Makia and you have to forgive yourself also and the people who hurt you it's not all about forgetting because you can't really forget something like that." He said.

"Ugh your right." I said opening my room door.

"Yeah I know I'm always right." I rolled my eyes.
"Get out of my room." I said pushing him out and shutting my door. I sat on my bed and opened the paper she gave me.

" Achievement of your happiness is the only moral purpose of your life, and that happiness, not pain or mindless self-indulgence, is the proof of your moral integrity, since it is the proof and the result of your loyalty to the achievement of your values."

"Knock Knock bitch !" Ashley bust in my room talking all loud and shit. She was a cool white girl but wild very wild. She remind me of Kenya.

"Ugh what do you want." I said sitting on my bed.

"Geesh I just came to talk to my friend but I see you don't wanna be bothered it's cool though." I just laughed at this crazy girl. Ashley reason of being here was a lot different. She thought if she would get pregnant that he would stay with her and love her more but that didn't happen he kidnapped her and let his friends gang rape her till she had miscarriage. He left her their tied up she eventually escaped and started doing drugs and cutting herself. Till one day someone found her in back of building unconscious from overdosing and stabbing herself.

"Ugh you zone out a lot you know that but we're having visitors tomorrow." She said smiling

"Why are you so happy about that?" I asked confused because nobody but her sister comes and that's only been two times. We've been here for five months.

"Because I get too see your fine ass brother." I rolled my eyes.

"You have phone call Makia." Tyson said peeking into the room. I picked up the phone next to my bed.

"Hello"

"Babygirl how are you?"

"Daddy..."

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