Chapter 15: "I am scared Indy. So, fucking scared."

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Three days have passed since the day Austin dropped me off

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Three days have passed since the day Austin dropped me off. Jay and I... We haven't exactly been on speaking terms; he ends up ignoring me whenever I talk to him and whenever he talks to me it's only about how I shouldn't hangout with Austin.

He went as far as talking to Ryan and telling him I am getting 'involved' with a guy I shouldn't be getting involved with. So yesterday when Ryan talked to me, he gave me a whole lecture on how 'boys' are stupid and I shouldn't waste my time on them, I was very mad at Jayden and I haven't even tried to talk to him since.

Right now, sitting in my room, wearing one of Ryan's old hoodie after coming home from tutoring Austin I am reading this new book I had ordered and had arrived just a day ago. My hand goes into the bag of chips I was having only to notice it was empty.

I groan slightly just as Ace and Jay enter the room. I don't say anything to Jay, and I pretend to just continue reading as Ace jumps on my bed and makes his head comfortable on my thighs.

"Indy..." I hear Jay say but I ignore him. "Indy, please. I know you probably don't want to talk to me but just hear me out." He pleads and I sigh, marking my page number before closing my book down on my night stand.

"Go on." I mumble. "I... I am sorry." He starts as he takes a seat on the edge of the bed, before sighing and looking at me. "I am sorry that I acted like an asshole. Your right, your now grown up and hell we are the same age and I shouldn't have acted... so controlling, it wasn't right." He speaks.

Before I could say anything, he continues speaking. "I am scared Indy. So, fucking scared." He mumbled and lets out a dry chuckle. He looks me in the eye before sighing. "I am scared that once you fall in love and get a boyfriend... You will forget me. You might replace me. You're my best friend Indy, my other half and my twin. You're my favorite person in the whole world who I can count on, I am closer to you than anyone else. It's always been us Indy, the both of us, even Ryan knows that. I am just scared after a boy comes in your life... He will start to become your best friend and that you would talk to him more than me and I am scared we will lose our bond.

"Fuck, I know Austin is good for you. I see the way he looks at you most times. You guys may have not realized it yet but God, you both look at each other like love struck fools or something, like half of the time you guys just stare at each other as if taking in the most beautiful thing you have seen. I am scared that one day you realize just how much you love each other and then I won't matter anymore." He mumbles, staring down at his feet, a sad smile on his face.

"Jay..." I whisper, tears almost coming to my eyes. "You're my twin. No one. And I mean no one can take your place. You're always going to be my best friend, my brother, my other half no matter what. No boy can change that. Jay, don't you ever think I will replace you because I won't. You mean the world to me and I love you the most in the world. And even if I do fall in love with a boy Jay, its going to be another kind of love. I am going to love you both differently and never am I going to replace you." I say and crawl to where he is, before hugging him.

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