Tris and I were just casually making out on my bed when suddenly I got a sharp shooting pain going through my body. I groaned “What’s wrong princess?” he asked me. I shook my head as I shook up and collapsed to the floor clutching my stomach. Tris ran over to me then I noticed I was bleeding, “Tris… I’m bleeding” I said as he held me. “Come on, let’s get you to the hospital” he said as he helped me downstairs. He told my parents and my mum drove us.

I got rushed off to a room and found out that I had lost the baby. The drive home was quiet and slightly awkward as I looked out of the window blocking everything and everyone out.

As I lay on my bed, I just lay there trying to put together why it happened as Tris sat at the foot of my bed watched ‘Frozen’. I sat up and sat next to him cuddling my teddy bear he gave me. He looked at me and smiled sadly. I returned the sad smile as I rested my head on his shoulder. He held my waist and rested his head on mine. We stayed like that for a while before he sighed “Babe, we’ll have to talk about it” he said soothingly. I nodded “I nodded “I know” I said as I stood up and binned the scan pictures “It never happened, we just tell people it wasn’t meant to be and leave it at that” I said. Tris just looked at me “You want to pretend that we didn’t conceive a child?” he asked me. I sighed “I was pregnant for 12 weeks” I said as I sat next to him. He stood up and took the pictures out of the bin and looked at it. I sighed hiding the fact I wanted to cry. “Babe, don’t hold it in, if you want to cry, cry” he said as his voice started to crack, before he broke down crying. I held him close as he cried, after a while I started to cry.

I lay on my back as Tris lay his head on my chest, he’d fallen asleep due to all the crying he was doing. I wanted to fall asleep but I couldn’t switch off. I had a million and one things running through my head as I gently stroked Tris’ hair through my fingers. In the year we had been together, that was the first time I had seen him properly break down crying. It hurt me to the core to see him cry like that, it broke my heart and it was all my fault, because my body failed me to give him child. When we had our first date he told me that he wanted three kids and I couldn’t give him one. I gently moved his head onto the pillow and went to the bathroom before throwing up.

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