Ay Dios Mio!

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That day I walked into Gary’s Groceries with the foulest attitude I’d had in weeks. The week really hadn’t been meant for me and nothing made that more apparent than the fat ass F I received on my five page essay in World Literature. Pissed much? Yeah I was beyond pissed and to top it off my car had a freaking flat on the way to work.

So I wasn’t in the mood for boss man’s mouth or his thinning hair for that much. I mean seriously I thought they came up with Rogaine for a reason?

Well, whatever. I didn’t need one more person telling me how much of a failure I was, college was doing a pretty good job of that already.

As soon as I stepped foot into the store the staleness of it all smacked me damn near in the face. My eyes got to bulging like a woman with a most terrible case of dysentery and my stomach got to bubblin.

Yeah I lied.

 None of that happened, I just wanted to make the scenario a little more dramatic than it already was. So like I was saying, I walked into Gary’s Groceries (It smelled fine) and made a beeline right for the break room. I haven’t mentioned it but by then I was twenty minutes late and I knew boss man would be on my ass like white on rice. I could practically hear him insulting me to one of the supervisors as I walked through that door: “Damn college students think they can come in here whenever they want and leave just as soon as they graduate.”

As a matter of fact I did think that (rarely) but that wasn’t one of those days and I hoped he would forgive me for my crap car sitting all lonesome like on the lot right next to the garbage can.

“Please, please, please.” I muttered to myself as I passed through those fugly brown doors.

I clocked in, tapping my foot impatiently as I punched in my team member number and pressed enter.

Twenty-Two minutes late, great.

Boss man (number two in command), not Gary himself but his uptight son spotted me from his office as I passed through another set of double doors to the break room. The clerk, an overweight brown lady by the name of Susanna clucked her tongue at me and tsked. My own person funeral music, oh what joy.


Have you ever imagined what it would be like if a Hurricane swooped down out of nowhere and swallowed you up like you weighed nothing? Did you imagine next, how that same Hurricane would toss you to and fro within its endless spirals only to vomit you up like rancid food the next?

That’s what I felt like good ole Mr. John was about to do to me.

I stepped away from the double doors and refrained from saluting him mockingly as he marched over. Literally. This man’s legs went up like he was doing knee highs. I would have to get him to teach me how to do that by the way.

Normally my boss was beyond gorgeous, that was the only thing about him that kept me from leaving the job in a huff, because you see, I had a school girl crush on him. Yeah I know, it may sound sick but listen, the man was only 28 at the time, and by God did he have an amazing set of black curls and pretty brown eyes. I could even look over the fact that he was pasty skinned (not my kind of guy at all) and fall in love with those two dimples every time he smiled.

That being said he looked nothing like his father, the Elder Mr. John with the receding hair line problem. Only thing was that he was engaged to some dinky looking librarian who reminded me of a European version of myself (at least he had taste).

So crushes aside I was prepared to die (emotionally, mentally) because I knew he was about to chew me up and spit me out.


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