I am definitely too beat to have this conversation. I lay my head on the pillow and look down.
"Im sure you know..." my voice trails off.
He stands up. "I was starting to get very suspicious after four months of constant sex, you weren't pregnant. I thought maybe you just weren't fertile. But then I realized that you hadn't had but one period in our four months of marriage, which is irregular. I just assumed that you were an infertile woman with irregular periods. Its not impossible. I guess my suspicions were true. You better have a good ass medical reason to be taking these pills."
I close my eyes. "Michael Im really tired."
"And Im pissed. Answer the damn question." He says, clutching the box of pills in his hand.
I sit up sleepily. "I started taking them right after our honeymoon night. I was so scared of getting pregnant I went to a doctor."
Michael frowns. "What do you mean you're scared of getting pregnant? You're afraid of pain? Nausea? Afraid of the responsibility?
I shake my head. "I am not ready to have children. Im not ready for the responsibility. I am just getting used to this marriage."
"Everyone, even people living under rocks, know that I have always wanted a family. That includes a wife and children! Now youre telling me you're not ready?" He says angrily.
"I dont remember you exactly talking to me about that Michael! All you ever told me was how much you wanted to bed me and take me home with you! I didnt know that was code for 'have my children tomorrow'!" I say, waking up.
"Im not getting any younger." He says, pacing back and forth.
"You are seriously not trying to force me to have kids right now Michael. Im the one that has to carry the baby while you sit back and smile about how great they will be when they come out. You have absolutely no say in when and if I have your children!" I yell, laying back down.
"You are done taking these pills." He says simply.
"Excuse me? No I am not!" I scoff.
"Yes you are. Get rid of them or I will do it for you." He says, frowning.
"If you get rid of my pills then you have to use condoms from now on." I say, folding my arms.
"Thats not happening. Im not using condoms with my wife."
"Then give me back my pills." I reach for them.
He throws them in the trash can.
"Michael!" I yell and get out of bed.
He ties the bag and opens the window, throwing the bag out of our bedroom window. My mouth is on the floor.
"You have really lost your mind." I say, shocked by his actions.
"Go get your pills if you want them so bad." He says evily.
"I guess that means you will have to get Kenny to buy you some packs of condoms." I say, laying down.
"I think you're the one who has lost her mind." He says, coming over to the bed. "We are doing it the old fashioned way so you can have my babies."
"You know what Michael? You cant control everything I do! You wanna throw away my pills? Refuse to use protection when I have told you Im not ready for kids? Well you can go fuck yourself cause you aint fuckin me!" I grab my blankets and walk out of the room, going into the guest room.
"Esmeralda!" Michael yells in the hallway.
I slam and lock the door. I cant believe him! He's not going to have to suffer through pregnancy or care for the baby like I will have to! I cant believe he wouldnt respect my decision to wait to have kids! I am still very tired so I fall asleep with all of this on my mind.