𝐨𝐡 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 || steve randles sister

𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐧 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧

pulling the car up to one of the two pumps, i put the engine in park and slammed the door behind me after climbing out. clutching the set of keys in my hand, i wrapped steves flannel over my body to cover my open skin so that my arms were now crossed in front of my stomach instead of dangling at my side.

pushing open the front door, the bell jingled, signaling my appearance.

"be right there!" someone screamed from the garage so loud my ears started to ring. i could immediately tell that it was soda, and by the sound of two pairs of laughs and giggles, i knew steve was back there to.

walking up and down the isles to pass what little time they spent in the back, i soon met my brother at the register where i pulled a ten outta my jeans pocket.

"pump one." i said blankly, staring soda into his widened eyes. he was wiping the grease form his hands before jokingly running it through his hair.

somehow suddenly surprising him with my company, he began to speak.

"god olive, i haven't seen ya for like three days!" his cheeky smile made me blush a violent red trying not to laugh at his over exaggeration. his head tilted a little further to the side with each word that he spoke. kinda like a puppy when you talk in a baby voice to make them happy.

"yeah, man. been a while." i sighed after containing myself. i wasn't in the mood to be all that happy, so in tossing the ten on the counter, i spun on my heals to walk out.

"keep the change." i mumbled, shoving my arms into a fold above my chest like they were before i had pulled the money from my pocket.

"yo, kid." steve laughed, almost as if my dull and lifeless attitude was a joke.

"what's wrong wit you?" all of a sudden he seemed worried with my silence, he walked out from behind the counter and caught quickly up to me. putting a hand on my shoulder, he forced me to turn around. facing him, i sighed again.

"you hurt or somethin?" he asked at my glossed over eyes, wiping a tear that had fallen down my cheek with his thumb.

i usually don't cry infront of people, but crying by myself is something completely different. i guess what really got to my emotions is that i thought i hated ponyboy for what he said to me that night. i thought i hated him and i was wrong. it's so hard to feel negative towards someone you have such complex feelings for.

i was so confused on what i felt and what i wanted to feel.

i was so mad that i wasn't to the point where i hated him, but still so saddened by the words that he spoke. so angry with the truth laced in his screams. i was a freak, and he didn't have a problem pointing it out.

i mean, just seeing his relations even in my friends made me sick as to how they could even tolerate him. i wanted to hate him and i couldn't, but that doesn't take away from the fact that i was utterly pissed.

i think it's possible to hate myself more then i hate pony. i mean, jesus christ, i literally made out with stevies girl i top of everything else. i cant look at the guy, man. i cant be the one to tell him she obviously ain't like men as much as he thought.

there's two things killing me right now. and only one had me dead.

"goddammit, lemme see the wrist." he demanded, grabbing my casted hand and examining it in his. staring closely at the shaggy wrapping that was close to falling off, his gaze went up my arm, and so did his hands. checking out my neck while moving my head side to side. he looked at me, frightened that i couldn't say a word.

catching the glimpse of a hickey i forgot to cover, he took it as a bruise and nothing less.

"who did that." he sighed, running his hand over the mark that led down my chest.