Ezra May

Chapter 6

I can't believe it. People actually like my work, I am smiling so big I don't think I could smile any bigger. I might even be screaming a little, I definitely am inside my head. To you this might seem like a silly thing to get so excited and worked up over some drawings, but to me my drawings are my best memories, and the things that got me through the hardest parts of my life.

After I woke up, I had eaten some cereal, then I had put on my pair dark ripped jeans, a white t-shirt and a tan cardigan, because today is actually the day I get to see Adryan. I had remembered that I had posted on Instagram so I was checking it to see what people thought, and they were loving it. I had only had one follower before I had posted, now I have almost two thousand, and my post has a little over three thousand likes. There were tons of comments saying that they want more drawings, that my work is some of the best they have ever seen. I really can't believe it. Right now I am filled with overcoming pride and joy. Maybe Vic was right, maybe this isn't just a silly dream.

My username was @drawingmylife; I really was drawing my life, maybe not directly, but indirectly the things I draw all represent something, like the bonfire symbolizes my new friend Victoria, and I had drawn a girl with crazy hair that was all over the place, and that had symbolized Christmas morning one year when Amy thought her hair looked fine but when she looked back at the pictures that mom had took she realized it looked terrible, then we were all laughing.

Vic is going to be so excited when she sees this. I will call her as soon as I can, but in a little bit Adryan is going to knock on the door then hopefully we will spend the day together, and after that things might go back to how they used to be. I am slightly worried still because I still cannot stop thinking about Jack. I hate it, why right when I get finally to see Adryan again do I get this insane curve ball.

I hear two knocks on the door, and my heart drops, I know exactly who it is. Adryan. I push all my thoughts about Jack aside and quickly go to the door and open it. As soon as I do Adryan steps inside the house and picks me up hugging me. I hug him back and barrow my head into the crick of his neck. He smells like he always used to, of fresh sandalwood. "I have missed you so much Ez!" He says as he also buries his face in the crook of my neck.

"I missed you too!" I reply as I take a deep breath in to smell him some more. Everything that I loved about him is coming back, the way his brown eyes would catch mine from across the room, and it seemed as though we were sharing secrets, or the ways his curly black hair would bounce back as I ran my fingers through it. It also reminds me of how I kinda wish it was Jack embracing me right now, but I try to ignore that. "Hey, do you want to go to the park?" I ask him. That is where we used to always go when we were dating, we would go to the park and play on the placeset like we were little kids, and walk along, the trails, or just lay on a blanket and talk.

"Of, course," he says, setting me back down, and smoothing out his white sweatshirt that is a big contrast from his dark skin, then he smooths out my hair running his fingers through it and tucking it behind by ear, he never used to do that, why is he doing it now, "We really need to talk." I know we need to, but what if everything doesn't or can't go back to normal, what if he can't make me forget about whatever happened with Jack. I never thought about anyone else when I was with Adryan, and I want to stop thinking about Jack.

I pack a small backpack with a blanket, and some snacks and we walk down the three steps from my porch to the sidewalk and we begin the 10 min walk to the park while we are holding hands and he is rubbing his thumb against my hand.

When we get there we go to the garden, which smells like sweet roses. I lay down the old worn out plaid red and black wool blanket, and then we lay down. I set my head on his lap and stretch my legs out, while crossing my ankles, he sits there with one hand supporting him so he does not fall backward, he plays with my hair with the other hand. Running it through my long black hair. He is different now, when he was here he was scrawny and he really wanted to be popular, but because he was my boyfriend he always just put that desire aside, but now he is not so scrawny, he is now he is pretty muscular, and he seems to be over that desire to be popular, not because he doesn't care about it anymore, but because it seems like it isn't a desire now, but something that is real. It kinda makes me nervous, what if he is like Mika and her friends now?

We talk and laugh for hours, we eat the snacks, and just have fun. He keeps avoiding talking when I bring up why we broke up, saying that he doesn't know why he did that, and that it is not a big deal, or that it is in the past and we should both just put it all behind us, and even avoiding it completely and changing the subject. I can't do that though, he hurt me in a way that is unforgettable. The only way that this relationship will work is if we talk through it. If we are both sorry, and we are both working to make it work. We can have a healthy relationship if we just put everything behind us and pretend it didn't happen because it did, and we can change the past, but we can always make the future better, but we can't do that unless we talk.

I decide that we will talk about it later, but I have to make sure of one thing first. "Adryan?"

"Yea,"

"Promise me something,"

"What is it?''

"Promise me that you won't break my heart again?" I say hoping he will get that what he did really hurt me.

"I already told you it is in the past, and we just need to put it behind us, but I do promise that I won't hurt you again. All those months that I was away, I never stopped thinking about you, eventually it got to be too much and I needed to have you back. That is why I am here. I promise that I won't do anything stupid like what I did again." he replies looking down at me. I half smile back up at him, before he presses a soft kiss to my lips. He definitely got better at kissing while he was gone, I wonder who he got better with. Still the kiss is not even like he was before he left, it just seems forced and something that he has to do, and not something that he really wants to do. Not how it felt when I kissed Jack, not at all.