Chapter 1

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For AnnMarieThrush

A/N: IT WORKED!!!! TO THE OTHERS!!!!

"How are you feeling today, Mitchell?" I turned to look at my therapist. He had a clipboard in front of him and began writing something down when I turned back to looking at the window. I closed my eyes but Scott had me blocked out. I wonder what happens when he decides to shut me out. I know he does it when his father beats him. But he hasn't been living with his father. He moved out and was now living with a roommate. I let my eyes flutter open.

"I'm fine."

"Is Scott still with you?"

"Not right now." I whispered. I brought my knees up to my chest. I looked over at my therapist again. "Why does everyone think I'm crazy?"

"You saw the evidence. We have found no trace of a Scott Hoying in California." He tried to come forward to touch me. I flinched away. "You're not crazy, Mitch. This is your outlet for coping with bullying."

"He's real. I know he is." I felt Scott come back. His mind was open again and he was looking through me. I told him I had a therapy session today. He said he would be here with me. And here he is.

"Have you told him about this?" My therapist put my acceptance letter to Juilliard.

"You have no right to show him that."

"He can access your mind, right? He can shut you out when he doesn't want you to see bad things? Maybe the reason you don't see these things is because these are your suppressed memories." I swallowed nervously. I was focusing on Scott talking to me now. I closed my eyes.

"Why, Mitch? Why didn't you tell me?" He was much taller than me. His blonde hair was spike and the sides were shaved. He had his arms crossed over his chest as his blue eyes looked at me with a hint of pain. He was hurt that I didn't tell him.

"I made you a promise."

"Mitch....this is your dream school. You and Kevin always talked about going there." He came forward but he couldn't touch me. "No one can save me. I tried to leave. Remember? He always finds me. And he hurts me. I can never escape my father."

"Scott-"

"Remember when you were twelve and I tried to kiss you? Remember when our minds wouldn't let us?" He put his hand up and I put mine in front of his. But they refused to close the distance. "I think....I think this means we weren't meant to be together."

"How could you say that?!" He moved one of his fingers forward and it forced mine to bend backwards slightly. "I need to meet you. I need to know you're real and I'm not crazy."

"What about Juilliard? What about playing the piano and violin for the rest of your life?" I let my hand drop.

"My parents are going to have me institutionalized. I just know it. They don't believe me and you're all I can think about."

"You don't want a look into my life, Mitch." I tried to reach out and touch his cheek. I couldn't feel him though.

"You try hide things but I know. The night you tried to run away, he raped you. He let his friends take advantage of you. And you can't cope and you won't tell me anything. You try to hide it but I know you hurt yourself, Scott. I could help you." I felt tears pouring down my face. I took a step away from him.

"You don't need to worry yourself about me."

"You dropped out of school, you have track marks on your arms. You turn to drugs but you don't turn to me?" He licked his lips. "I want to save you because you are my best friend. You've always been there for me. So let me be there for you."

"You'll go to another college for me?" I nodded with a small blush. He couldn't contain his smile. "You have the cutest blush."

"Do you ever wonder what would have happened if you left that night?"

"I probably would have died. I only had enough money to get me to Las Vegas." He looked around the empty space. "I have to go."

"Scott?" I was biting my bottom lip. He was looking at me. "You're real, right?" He smiled.

"Yes. I promise." I opened my eyes and a tear went down my cheek.

"What's wrong, Mitch?" I was staring pass my therapists head. How much did I want to believe Scott? With all of my heart. He had to be real. I was prescribed more medicine before I was sent home. I was playing with my food at dinner.

"So Juilliard?" I dropped my fork when my mom brought the subject up.

"I told you I'm not going. I didn't even send that application in. You did." My dad remained silently eating. My mom and I always managed to yell at each other every day.

"You're a wonderful musician, Mitch. You need to forget about this Scott character."

"He's not a character! And maybe he's helping me. Most musician are fucking insane so why shouldn't I be?!" She calmly tried to respond to me.

"I don't think you're insane. Do you?" My mom turned to my dad. My father silently shook his head. He didn't like to get involved.

"So that's not the reason you were looking at asylums? You should clear your browser history. And so should you!" I turned to my dad with an embarrassed blush. He had been looking up ways to explain gay sex to a gay son. Which led him to a bunch of porn pages. The history said he quickly clicked out but still! He doesn't need to explain that stuff to me. I would prefer he not.

"You understand we only do this because we care about you, right? You're our son."

"Sometimes I feel like an alien. You don't believe me. Scott's real. I love him." I realized too late that Scott had been listening in. Before I could explain myself, he shut me out. I wish he would talk to me about what he is thinking. I got up from the table with a small sigh. We used to always tell each other 'I love you'. But now it seems like Scott doesn't care. And he hasn't been looking in mirrors lately so I was stuck with an image of him accidentally looking at his reflection in a store window.

"How about we go out to California?" My dad suggested. I looked back at him hopefully.

"What?" He slowly folded the napkin that was in his lap.

"If you care that much about this boy, why don't we find out of he's real?"

"Dad, I-" I ran over to hug him. "It would mean the world. I need to know." He returned the hug tightly.

"Then to California we go."

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